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Every programming tutorial for beginners

cilvako profile image Silvia Bogdan ・2 min read
  • Hello guys, what's going on?
  • This is a complete beginner's tutorial series. Anyone can program.
  • No previous experience is necessary but knowing Javascript, Ruby, Python, PHP and C# would be nice.
  • We're gonna take a deep dive.
  • After finishing this tutorial you'll have a solid understanding of the concepts.
  • I'll try to keep it short.
  • I'm using an older version of the program but you can use whichever version you like, it totally works the same.
  • This is a Mac installation so you have to find a tutorial for Windows installation yourself.
  • I'll start with something very simple.
  • We must install these 81 external libraries.
  • Let's write our first program: print("Hello world!").
  • And it's that easy, you just wrote your first fully functional program.
  • Now we're going to create, you're not gonna guess, a To-do app.
  • Don't worry if you don't understand the code, I will explain in a bit.
  • Your variables should have descriptive names.
  • So we have these three variables, let's call them foo, bar and baz.
  • Feel free to pause this video and write the code yourself.
  • O.k guys, we're back. I changed the code a bit while I was off screen.
  • So basically what you wanna do is...
  • The video is already too long so I'm not gonna go over all of these concepts in detail.
  • Don't worry about this for now.
  • You can find the source code in the description.
  • Now compile your code and you're done.
  • If you have any questions, leave them in the comments.
  • Don't forget to like and subscribe.
  • If you want to learn more, head over to my Udemy page where you can find more quality content like this.
  • See you guys in the next tutorial.

A list of some of the most common things I heard while watching a gazillion Youtube videos. This is satire so treat it like satire. Feel free to add to the list 😊.

Image source: Mimi Thian/ @mimithian on Unsplash

Posted on by:

cilvako profile

Silvia Bogdan

@cilvako

Front-end developer by day, front-end developer by night. My dog is my biggest supporter.

Discussion

markdown guide
 

I miss the good old days...

480p video
notepad with text size 40px
Starts typing: hello in this tutoril[backspace]al [3 second pause] i wan [backspace backspace]t to show y[2 secnod pause]ou myy[typo is left in] codez for...

 

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ You still got those noobs around these days...

 

Haha, I can't even read that. Unfortunately, I didn't catch the good old days as I started writing code pretty late. But it looks awful :)).

 
  • 15 minute video that can be sumarized in a half-page post.

  • Screen recording with crazy techno music, Kali Linux with the smallest possible font size, window transparency at 90%, and no comment or explanation whatsoever.

  • "bmbms bsm, ssmstm snsmy drddsbam" (video recorded from the bathroom with a potato)

 

"bmbms bsm, ssmstm snsmy drddsbam" LOL!
Let's not forget about the sound going from too loud to too low all the time.

 

We will make you a first-class software programming expert in < 15 minutes. (Never mind that the real pros needed years, if not decades, to master the craft. With OUR help, YOU can do it in a heartbeat.)

 

"We'll make you job ready."

 

That's why you don't take YouTube as a source.

There are a few channels out there from experts. You just have to find them and do your research (check their twitter etc.)

Although even some experts are bad at teaching...

 

To be honest, I've seen many of the stuff mentioned above on Udemy (and others....) πŸ˜‚

 

Well yeah that's why:

  • You look at the date of the course
  • You look how many people did the course (and the comments, stars)
  • You look at the profile/twitter of the lecturers. If they made like 10 good selling courses, the chance is high, that their courses are not that bad. And if they are a Microsoft MVP (or whatever title (or job) they have and their twitter bio) then they should also know what they are doing.

And last ... wait until the courses are cheap πŸ˜‚

But I agree...it seems A LOT of people just try to make quick money with some of these courses

 

About that, I posted my first tutorial on Youtube and I speak with a terrible accent smelling like cheese about grep saying that it's simple, that I will teach it and that it's great. You can use the files in the description and I have some links there as well and you should click on it and I want to help and see you in the next video and I made a mistake ooppss and you know and so and euhhh.

😨

Disappear in a cloud of shame

 

you forgot the attached CSS file/s to make it look good with just the "put this file there"

 

Yes, yes. "This is not a CSS tutorial so just copy this in your file".

 

"After finishing this course, I guarantee you will find your dream job" -> and the only thing you're coding is a to-do app.

 

Yes, apparently there's an obsession with to-do lists and counters. No idea why :D.

 
 
  • It's very simple, you just use these complicated things together and voila it's done.

πŸ˜…

 

Oh, yesss, the "voila" thing :)).

 
 

Oh, and the classic:
We will start from scratch and go through EVERY SINGLE step... So check out the prepared sources from XYZ ...

 

I will just copy and paste this line of code. πŸ˜‚

 

You blink once and poooof, 60 new lines or code appear from nowhere.

 

Π₯Π°ΡƒΠ΄ΠΈ Π₯ΠΎ (Russian programmers will get it)

 

Clickbait title, LEARN REACT, GRAPHQL AND TYPESCRIPT IN 2 MINUTES

 

Please make a youtube version of this!

 

I thought about but I'm not sure videos are my thing. But maybe, maybe...

 

🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣