DEV Community: Nikitha Malgi

Is It Just Me, or Is "Dev Anxiety" Hitting Different Lately?

Nikitha Malgi — Wed, 04 Mar 2026 17:18:38 +0000

I’ll be honest: my Code & Crayons balance has felt a little lopsided lately. And not because the kids are extra chaotic (though they are), but because the tech world feels like it’s moving at a speed my human brain wasn't built for.

Lately, every time a new Claude update drops or another "AI Software Engineer" is announced, I feel a pit in my stomach. It’s a specific kind of anxiety—the fear that the "craft" I’ve spent years honing is being compressed into a single prompt.

Being a developer right now feels like standing on shifting sand. If you’re feeling it too, here is what’s been on my mind:

Imposter Syndrome 2.0: I find myself wondering if I’m actually a good developer anymore, or if I’m just becoming a glorified "copy-paste" specialist for AI suggestions.

The "Why Bother?" Filter: Sometimes I start to research a new library and a voice in my head says, "Why bother? By the time you master this, an LLM will be doing it for you." That thought is a total motivation killer.

The Future Fear: As a mom, I think about the long game. What does this career look like in 5 years? Am I teaching my kids to pursue a path that’s shrinking, or just changing into something unrecognizable?

How I’m trying to snap out of it
I’ve had to remind myself that coding was never just about the code.
Code is just the ink; we are the ones who know what story needs to be told. Claude can write a function in seconds, but it doesn't know the frustration of a user trying to navigate a broken checkout flow, and it certainly doesn't know how to navigate a messy team meeting to find a compromise.
If you’re feeling "lost" or like the ground is moving too fast: you aren’t alone.
I’m learning to stop trying to "keep up" with the 24/7 AI news cycle. Instead, I’m trying to focus on being a problem solver who happens to use AI, rather than a coder who is afraid of it.
The crayons aren't obsolete just because we have digital tablets, and we aren't obsolete just because we have LLMs. But man, the transition is exhausting.

Are you feeling the "AI fatigue" in your daily workflow? How are you keeping your head on straight while the industry moves at warp speed? Let’s talk in the comments.

My first blog post is live! 🚀 “15 Years of Code, Chaos, and Motherhood” Give it a read — and if you're juggling parenting and programming too, I’d love to hear your story in the comments!

Nikitha Malgi — Tue, 10 Jun 2025 18:23:56 +0000

Nikitha Malgi

Jun 10 '25

Balancing Code and Crayons: A Mom’s Tech Tale

#womenintech #career #programming #productivity

Comments 3

3 min read

Balancing Code and Crayons: A Mom’s Tech Tale

Nikitha Malgi — Tue, 10 Jun 2025 18:14:25 +0000

“What’s harder: debugging production issues or convincing a toddler to eat their broccoli?”

I’ve been a software developer for 15 years, but becoming a mother taught me new kinds of problem-solving — and patience. This is a story about navigating both worlds: raising two children while building a career in tech.

Before Motherhood – A Love for Code

My journey into software development began with an obsession for solving problems and a slightly unhealthy excitement over building things from nothing. I still remember the thrill of writing my first working piece of code — a basic C program that did some elementary math. Yes, C. You read that right. Guess that makes me officially vintage. But hey, it was magic!

My early career was filled with long hours, debugging marathons, and imposter syndrome. But I loved every bit of it.

Back then, I had all the time in the world to explore new technologies, contribute to open source, and take on side projects. I had the luxury of focus — the ability to dive deep without interruption.

Enter Motherhood – Everything Shifts

When I had my first child, my world shifted overnight. Sleep became a luxury, and so did uninterrupted time. I returned to work with a sense of urgency but also a fog of fatigue. Then came my second child. With two little humans depending on me, I found myself constantly recalibrating.

Meetings during naptime. Code reviews with a baby monitor on my desk. Pumping between Zoom calls. The balancing act was real, and often, exhausting. There were moments I doubted myself, moments I felt I wasn’t giving 100% to either role.

Adaptation, Not Perfection

But here’s what I learned: perfection is overrated. Adaptability is the real superpower.

Motherhood sharpened my time management skills. I became ruthless with prioritization. I learned to set boundaries and say "no" without guilt. I stopped overengineering and started focusing on elegant, maintainable solutions. My empathy — both as a teammate and a leader — deepened.

Asking for help used to feel like weakness. Now, it feels like wisdom. I leaned on my team, my manager, my partner, and most importantly, my own intuition.

What I Wish More Women in Tech Knew

If I could go back and tell my younger self anything, it would be this: your career is a marathon, not a sprint.

It's okay to slow down.
It's okay to pause.
It's okay to redefine success.

Taking a step back for family doesn’t erase your past contributions or limit your future ones. Parenting is not a detour; it’s a parallel path that teaches resilience, creativity, and emotional intelligence — all of which make us better engineers.

Conclusion

I’ve shipped code that touched millions of users, and I’ve sung lullabies at 3 AM to two tiny humans. Both brought me pride, exhaustion, and growth.

You don’t have to choose between being a great engineer and a great mom. You just need space — and support — to be both.

And if you’re in the thick of it right now, juggling deadlines and diaper changes, know this: you’re not alone. You’re doing better than you think. Keep going.

About the Author

Malgi Nikitha Vivekananda is a software engineer, mentor, and mother of two, with 15+ years of experience writing code and leading teams. She’s passionate about building resilient systems — and even more resilient people. When she’s not debugging or storytelling, she’s likely chasing tiny humans or sipping coffee between Zoom calls. This blog is where tech meets life, one real story at a time.

Originally published on Medium