The latest articles on DEV Community by Sebin Mathew (@sebin_mathew_33808dbc3817). https://dev.to/sebin_mathew_33808dbc3817 https://media2.dev.to/dynamic/image/width=90,height=90,fit=cover,gravity=auto,format=auto/https:%2F%2Fdev-to-uploads.s3.us-east-2.amazonaws.com%2Fuploads%2Fuser%2Fprofile_image%2F3961534%2F2ffc5318-88da-498b-bef6-2810329ca825.jpg https://dev.to/sebin_mathew_33808dbc3817 en Sebin Mathew Mon, 09 Nov 2026 11:17:04 +0000 https://dev.to/sebin_mathew_33808dbc3817/i-built-a-programming-language-that-punishes-you-for-typing-too-fast-4fj4 https://dev.to/sebin_mathew_33808dbc3817/i-built-a-programming-language-that-punishes-you-for-typing-too-fast-4fj4 <p>Most programming languages want you to go faster. Faster compile times, faster iteration, faster shipping. So for TinkerHub's Useless Projects 2.0 hackathon — a Kerala event celebrating gloriously useless software — my teammate <a href="https://www.linkedin.com/in/abin-zachariah-abraham-124576339/" rel="noopener noreferrer">Abin Zachariah Abraham</a> and I went the other way: we built a language that actively slows you down.</p> <p><strong>SlowLang</strong> (also called TortoiseLang) is a sarcastic, Python-like programming language with its own Tkinter IDE. Its core feature is a typing-speed enforcer: type too fast and it throws errors at you.</p> <h2> What it actually does </h2> <ul> <li>It tracks your typing speed in the IDE. Cross the threshold and you get an angry ASCII turtle and a lockout until you calm down.</li> <li>Error messages are haikus and sarcastic praise instead of stack traces.</li> <li>There's a lazy mode that randomly refuses to run, because sometimes the code just isn't in the mood.</li> <li>It runs in the browser too — a Pyodide-powered demo mirrors the desktop behavior, no install needed.</li> </ul> <p>Under the jokes there's real engineering: a keyboard-event monitor, a state machine for turtle moods (calm / annoyed / furious), a rage lockout timer, and a pytest suite covering the spec. The browser demo reimplements the same state machine in JavaScript, so both versions behave identically.</p> <h2> Why build something useless on purpose </h2> <p>The hackathon's whole point was creativity over practicality. Building a joke with craft taught us more than a CRUD app would have: state machines, desktop UI with Tkinter, packaging a Python project properly, and porting the same behavior to a WASM runtime for the web demo. Also, it won — SlowLang took first place at Useless Projects 2.0.</p> <p>I wrote about the event itself <a href="https://www.linkedin.com/posts/sebin-m_uselessprojects-creativity-innovation-activity-7364503415713943552-sttp" rel="noopener noreferrer">on LinkedIn</a> earlier, and posted <a href="https://www.linkedin.com/posts/sebin-m_excited-to-share-that-our-project-slowlang-activity-7377585860021669888-JQKx" rel="noopener noreferrer">the winner announcement</a> when the results came out.</p> <h2> Try it / steal it </h2> <ul> <li> <strong>Browser demo:</strong> <a href="https://sebin-gg.github.io/slowlang/" rel="noopener noreferrer">https://sebin-gg.github.io/slowlang/</a> — no install, Pyodide under the hood</li> <li> <strong>Source:</strong> <a href="https://github.com/sebin-gg/slowlang" rel="noopener noreferrer">https://github.com/sebin-gg/slowlang</a> — Python + Tkinter, tests included</li> <li> <strong>My portfolio:</strong> <a href="https://sebin-gg.vercel.app" rel="noopener noreferrer">https://sebin-gg.vercel.app</a> — the rest of what I build</li> </ul> <p>I'm a B.Tech CS student at College of Engineering Chengannur in Kerala, India. If a sarcastic turtle ever taught you anything about your typing habits, I'd love to hear it.</p> showdev python programminglanguages hackathon