So graphql is a new way to API designed by Facebook. Apollo implimented Facebook's spec in javascript to make it easy to use. They built Apollo server to implement the actual API and Apollo client to interface with a graphql server not just Apollo's server but any graphql server. I've used them both and they work well. To answer your question though no you don't have to use either Apollo tool, I think Facebook has their own implementation in node but it requires far more setup on your end. I would recommend you go forward with your current plan, and yes you would lose the benefit of the Apollo client if you don't use graphql server side.
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So graphql is a new way to API designed by Facebook. Apollo implimented Facebook's spec in javascript to make it easy to use. They built Apollo server to implement the actual API and Apollo client to interface with a graphql server not just Apollo's server but any graphql server. I've used them both and they work well. To answer your question though no you don't have to use either Apollo tool, I think Facebook has their own implementation in node but it requires far more setup on your end. I would recommend you go forward with your current plan, and yes you would lose the benefit of the Apollo client if you don't use graphql server side.