I can very much relate to this. I'm 33 and don't have a lot to show for it either. In my professional work, most of the work has been maintenance rather than writing something new. These days I have very little time for myself, and I chose to use it for things other than programming.
I have a lot of difficulting understand this whole 'social' aspect to development which seems to have arisen in popularity. That's the main reason I joined Dev. Programming has always been a mostly solitary activity for me. I'm happy with that, but realise that I have missed a lot of opportunities by isolating myself.
At the moment I have lost most of the motivation and confidence I had maybe 10 years ago, and have considered quitting altogether. The problem is that I have so much invested in this line of work and don't have enough social abilities to succeed in other jobs. I feel stuck.
So i totally relate to this! Read my article on dev.to/dechamp/the-burnout-how-do-.... I have dealt with the same thing as you.
It's just about removing the stress and finding the fun in it again.
The social thing was foreign to me as well. I liked dev.to because it seems super friendly and not to over crowded. So it was easy to post on here, and when I posted people actually responded.
I'm still struggling to be part of the social, but this is really motivating me. Feel free to reach out to me if you need a person to motivate you! You got this. Take a break, and then think about why you started and what parts made you excited. Then do those!
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