Have you experienced the negative impact of constant comparisons on your journey to success? If everyone's journey is unique, why do we compare so much? Is there any benefit to comparison, and if not, how do you stop?
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Top comments (9)
When I was young I had only one thought "I will only consider myself successful when I reach a Linus Torvalds level of recognition towards the community" - so any victory was just a "small step" towards the final objective
Today I'm most of the time "Am I having fun doing it? Will it help someone?" and that's enough to make me happy.
It's perfectly fine to compare with someone if you are using it to know where you are in the moment, but keeping it as a metric isn't exactly healthy
Love this!
Personally, due to the culture I was brought up in it was inevitable to compare yourself with your peers who are doing better than you.
As I evolved, I addressed all the self-criticality I was shoving myself down with (thanks to therapy) and decided to give myself some credit to survive this so long.
Nowadays, I notice it as soon as I compare myself with anyone and start comparing myself between the past, present and the future (visualising success).
It gives some joy and helps keep up with what I am doing to get to the future I want😊
It really depends on the situation.
I do my best not to compare because almost no one shares all the steps to their success. For example: I see people online that say they study 12 hours a day, and I think " Damn, I should be studying for at least 4 hours a day.", but behind the scenes, they have the support system that allows them to spend most of their time studying and I don't.
But, in other areas, it may be good to compare because I may be able to ask them what they are doing to be more efficient and apply those same steps so that I can see the progress I want to see .
As a dev, I believe it's okay to have a few people you look up to, but comparing yourself with anybody? That's a big No.
IMO: Depending who are you comparing with.
With yourself? Indicated.
With someone else? Thief of Joy.
No. The direction of the comparison makes the difference. Compare yourself constantly against less able, less capable, less fortunate people and you experience humility and joy. Compare yourself constantly against the more able, the more capable, and the more fortunate people and you risk experiencing envy and feelings of inadequacy.
But there's a big difference between comparisons and inspirations. You might rightly be inspired by others, and see that you might be as ... whatever ... as they are, and you see that as a goal not a measure of worth. That's also a solid thing, but less a comparison than an inspiration.
Unfortunately, I am very prone to comparing myself to my friends in college.
I take every attribute of myself, i.e., academics, sports, coding, etc., and manage to find at least one friend better than me at that quality.
I know I should instead just focus on my personal growth and see how far I've come, but it's so easy to just compare myself to people around me. Too easy...
I do believe comparison is the thief of joy. I also believe no one can honestly say they don’t do that.