This article is called "Am I A Good Software Engineer". Yet, the content of the article is not about whether you're a good software engineer or not. It's about how your perception of yourself is skewed because you compare yourself to others, and because you believe the world believes in 10x ninja myth. I think there's also a deeper question that you haven't expressed consciously, but I think it lingers in your subconsciousness, and I'll get to it.
First of all, what actually defines whether you're a good software engineer or not? There's different ways to slice the pie: e.g. does "good" mean experienced? Can a novice developer be good, and what distinguishes them from a bad novice developer? Honestly, if you start thinking of this, it becomes uncomfortable to attribute "good" and "bad" to people, and it's much easier and fairer to attribute "good" and "bad" to code. I'd argue the following: (1) Good code is easier to read, easier to maintain, has better performance, and (2) A more experienced developer produces good code more consistently and more intuitively. So, the question "am I a good software engineer" boils down to "do I produce good code consistently and intuitively".
Now, as you see, this definition doesn't have anything to do with working every weekend, writing blog posts often, having certifications, etc. Those things are completely irrelevant. However, something made you think they are relevant... and that's where things get interesting.
Why do people get motivated to write blog posts and do side projects after their work? Why are some people more motivated than others? Those are legitimate questions. It is one thing to dismiss those questions by saying "maybe they're just better than me", but it is another to actually look into these questions with curiosity, self-compassion and open-mindedness.
Look into the following questions: (1) Why do you feel unmotivated? And (2) why do you think world believes in 10x ninjas myth?
More often than not, our subconsciousness is onto something, but it doesn't tell our consciousness the whole story. So we feel unmotivated, and start blaming the world for causing our anxiety and stress. There's a perception of a kind of peer pressure. However, this whole time, your subconsciousness was trying to tell you something else.
For example, maybe you feel unmotivated because you're not learning anything new at work. Perhaps your work is a mindless grind, and you've already learned everything you can. Perhaps you're forced to work on stupid bugs in legacy code, digging through piles of crappy code, even worse if under stringent deadlines. This situation might call for the change of a job. A job where people inspire you, where you learn things every day, where challenges are interesting rather than mundane, is a job that will deeply motivate you and is likely to inspire you to do your own projects.
Or, perhaps, there's another problem. Perhaps you spend so much time in your head, in abstraction, thinking and conceptualizing, that you lose touch with phenomenological reality (the quality of your experience of seeing, hearing, feeling). Hence, when you come home, you feel depleted and don't want to do any other thinking and conceptualizing. That's a common reason for burnout, and it may soon bleed into your job, no matter how interesting it is. The antidote for this issue is (1) being outside more, (2) being more physically active, (3) crucially, introducing mindfulness into your life. In mindfulness, you train your attention to focus on phenomenological experience and get out of conceptual level, get out of your head, which usually leads to an overall increase in your happiness.
I'd like to end my long analysis of your post by saying a few things. First of all, have self-compassion, it is always important. Secondly, challenge your own beliefs - the world does not necessarily believe in 10x ninjas - it is only your belief due to irrational impulse to compare yourself to others. I would argue that the world prefers developers like you, developers that deeply care and think about global and local issues, developers that ask questions and desire to improve, desire to be more motivated. And lastly, look into the deep reasons for your anxieties and motivation blocks - if done from a place of self-compassion and reason, this may transform your life for the better.
For further actions, you may consider blocking this person and/or reporting abuse
We're a place where coders share, stay up-to-date and grow their careers.
Notice something.
This article is called "Am I A Good Software Engineer". Yet, the content of the article is not about whether you're a good software engineer or not. It's about how your perception of yourself is skewed because you compare yourself to others, and because you believe the world believes in 10x ninja myth. I think there's also a deeper question that you haven't expressed consciously, but I think it lingers in your subconsciousness, and I'll get to it.
First of all, what actually defines whether you're a good software engineer or not? There's different ways to slice the pie: e.g. does "good" mean experienced? Can a novice developer be good, and what distinguishes them from a bad novice developer? Honestly, if you start thinking of this, it becomes uncomfortable to attribute "good" and "bad" to people, and it's much easier and fairer to attribute "good" and "bad" to code. I'd argue the following: (1) Good code is easier to read, easier to maintain, has better performance, and (2) A more experienced developer produces good code more consistently and more intuitively. So, the question "am I a good software engineer" boils down to "do I produce good code consistently and intuitively".
Now, as you see, this definition doesn't have anything to do with working every weekend, writing blog posts often, having certifications, etc. Those things are completely irrelevant. However, something made you think they are relevant... and that's where things get interesting.
Why do people get motivated to write blog posts and do side projects after their work? Why are some people more motivated than others? Those are legitimate questions. It is one thing to dismiss those questions by saying "maybe they're just better than me", but it is another to actually look into these questions with curiosity, self-compassion and open-mindedness.
Look into the following questions: (1) Why do you feel unmotivated? And (2) why do you think world believes in 10x ninjas myth?
More often than not, our subconsciousness is onto something, but it doesn't tell our consciousness the whole story. So we feel unmotivated, and start blaming the world for causing our anxiety and stress. There's a perception of a kind of peer pressure. However, this whole time, your subconsciousness was trying to tell you something else.
For example, maybe you feel unmotivated because you're not learning anything new at work. Perhaps your work is a mindless grind, and you've already learned everything you can. Perhaps you're forced to work on stupid bugs in legacy code, digging through piles of crappy code, even worse if under stringent deadlines. This situation might call for the change of a job. A job where people inspire you, where you learn things every day, where challenges are interesting rather than mundane, is a job that will deeply motivate you and is likely to inspire you to do your own projects.
Or, perhaps, there's another problem. Perhaps you spend so much time in your head, in abstraction, thinking and conceptualizing, that you lose touch with phenomenological reality (the quality of your experience of seeing, hearing, feeling). Hence, when you come home, you feel depleted and don't want to do any other thinking and conceptualizing. That's a common reason for burnout, and it may soon bleed into your job, no matter how interesting it is. The antidote for this issue is (1) being outside more, (2) being more physically active, (3) crucially, introducing mindfulness into your life. In mindfulness, you train your attention to focus on phenomenological experience and get out of conceptual level, get out of your head, which usually leads to an overall increase in your happiness.
I'd like to end my long analysis of your post by saying a few things. First of all, have self-compassion, it is always important. Secondly, challenge your own beliefs - the world does not necessarily believe in 10x ninjas - it is only your belief due to irrational impulse to compare yourself to others. I would argue that the world prefers developers like you, developers that deeply care and think about global and local issues, developers that ask questions and desire to improve, desire to be more motivated. And lastly, look into the deep reasons for your anxieties and motivation blocks - if done from a place of self-compassion and reason, this may transform your life for the better.