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Danielle Heberling
Danielle Heberling

Posted on • Originally published at danielleheberling.xyz on

Use Social Media Mindfully

I quit Facebook in 2020 when a former coworker was spreading misinformation about what was happening in Portland, OR. He'd never been there and had no plans to visit. I was literally living in Portland at the time, telling him what I was seeing firsthand, but that didn't matter to him. That was it for me. I miss it sometimes, but mostly I don't.

Here's what I've noticed since then: the heyday of social media feels like it's behind us. In my opinion, Facebook peaked in 2008. Back then, it was about connecting with friends, sharing actually interesting updates about our lives. Minimal ads. It felt genuine.

Now? Wannabe influencers everywhere. More ads and brand accounts in your timeline than content from people you actually know. Bots running campaigns to get engagement through false things or distortions of reality. It's exhausting.

But here's the thing: I'm not saying abandon social media entirely. I'm saying use it differently.

How I Think About Social Media Now

I'm not scrolling feeds endlessly anymore. No traps of getting lost in reels or stories. I use Buffer to schedule posts, which keeps me from even looking at a timeline. I check in with intention when I need to, then I'm out. This one's harder than it sounds, but it makes a real difference in how much time you lose to these platforms.

With that said, social media still works for connections. DMs are good. Having actual conversations in comments is good. Longer discussions where you're genuinely exchanging ideas? Even better. This is where I think the platforms still have value if you're intentional about it.

I try to share things that might help someone else. Good articles I've read. Things I'm learning. Mistakes I've made. If it could save one person some time or frustration, it's worth sharing. The stuff you've learned the hard way, the patterns you're seeing in your day job...not to build a personal brand or chase engagement metrics, but because someone else is probably dealing with the same problems.

If you're job hunting, LinkedIn especially can help you connect with the right people. It's not your whole career strategy, but it's a useful tool when you need it.

Here's where I think we've lost the plot though: we've forgotten that coffee with friends to catch up beats any social media interaction. Travel somewhere to see people you care about. Those face-to-face conversations are what actually matter.

What This Actually Looks Like

For me, this means I spend my time learning, reading, and building things. When I do post, it's usually because I want to hear what other people think about something I'm working through. Or I've hit a problem that took me way too long to solve and I figure sharing it might save someone else the trouble.

I'm not trying to go viral. I'm not optimizing for engagement. I'm definitely not checking how many likes something got.

The goal is simple: be helpful. Connect with people who are thinking about similar problems. Have real conversations, even if they happen in threads or comment sections. That's what matters and what I'm focused on in 2026.

Spend your time learning, reading, and building things. Use social media when it serves a purpose. Skip it when it doesn't.

What's your approach? I'd be curious to hear how other people are thinking about this stuff.

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