I didn't feel ready when I said yes to speaking at EmpowHER! — Sketching Visions, Building Futures.
Honestly? I'm not sure I ever feel ready. And I'm starting to think that's the whole point.
There's this quiet lie we tell ourselves — that we need to arrive somewhere first before we're allowed to start. That we need a title, a credential, a moment where everything finally clicks into place and someone hands us a permission slip to take up space. I spent a long time waiting for that moment. I'm done waiting.
The rooms that asked me to earn my voice twice.
I've been in rooms where my ideas needed a louder voice behind them before they were taken seriously. Rooms where I was the youngest person, the only woman, the one who "didn't look like" what leadership was supposed to look like. And for a while, I internalized that. I worked harder, spoke less, and convinced myself that visibility was something I had to earn rather than something I was already worthy of.
But here's what I know now:
that feeling — imposter syndrome, self-editing, shrinking — it doesn't disappear after graduation. It doesn't vanish when you get the job, the role, or the stage. It just changes shape.
The difference isn't that I stopped feeling it. The difference is that I stopped letting it make decisions for me.
I built communities not because I had it figured out, but because I cared enough to start.
When I got involved with AWS User Group BuildHers+, I wasn't an expert. I was someone who kept noticing the same gap — women and LGBTQIA+ folks in tech who were brilliant, capable, and quietly underestimated. I didn't have all the answers. I just had enough conviction to show up and try.
And that's how most meaningful things begin, I think. Not with certainty. With care.
The sessions I've helped organize, the mentors I've watched show up for students they'd never met, the women who come up after talks and say I thought I was the only one who felt that way — none of that happened because I waited until I was fully formed. It happened because I started anyway.
What "becoming" actually looks like.
Becoming isn't linear. It's not a ladder you climb rung by rung until you reach some final, polished version of yourself. It's messier and more interesting than that.
It looks like delivering a talk on imposter syndrome while quietly battling your own. It looks like building a mentorship program when you still have your own mentors you lean on. It looks like writing a caption, drafting remarks, crafting a space — and wondering the whole time if it's good enough — and then showing up anyway.
You are not a before. You're not waiting in a lobby until you become someone worth listening to. You are already in motion. Already building. Already becoming.
The table doesn't have to be given to you.
This is the line I keep coming back to. Not because it's defiant — though sometimes defiance is exactly what's needed — but because it's true.
If the room doesn't have space for you, you can build the room. If the conversation isn't happening, you can start it. If the people around you don't see what's possible, you can create the proof.
You don't need to feel ready. You don't need to have all the answers. You don't need a perfect plan or a flawless track record or someone else's validation before you begin.
You just need to start.
To every woman who's been talked over and showed up anyway. To every student who walked into a room full of "experienced" people and stayed. To everyone who's ever felt like they were building in the dark — you are not alone, and your work matters.
The table doesn't have to be given to you.
Build it.
To the AWS Cloud Club - HUGO team of TUP Manila:
Thank you. Genuinely.
Being invited to speak at EmpowHER! — Sketching Visions, Building Futures was one of those moments I didn't expect to sit with me as long as it did. But here I am, still thinking about the energy in that room, and it's entirely because of the space you created.
To the event chairladies, Charlote and Zendy — the way you lead is the kind of leadership that makes people feel like they belong before they even introduce themselves. You didn't just organize an event. You built something that mattered. And I was so honored to be a small part of it.
I came to share a story, but I think I left with more than I brought. That's the mark of a community that's doing something right.
Keep building! The tech space is better because you're in it.
If you made it to the end of this — thank you. Really. It means more than you know.
And if something here resonated with you, if you're somewhere in the middle of your own becoming and you have questions about the industry, corporate life, what it actually looks like to navigate tech as a woman or someone who's ever felt like they didn't quite fit — I want you to know my door is open.
If you'd like to be mentored, need someone to think out loud with, or just want a safe space to ask the questions you're afraid sound too small or too big — reach out. No agenda, no pressure. Just an honest conversation between people trying to figure it out together.
I can't promise I have all the answers. But I promise I'll show up for you the same way I wish someone had shown up for me.
Find me on LinkedIn. I'd love to hear from you. 🩷
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