It should be a case of criticising the code, rather than the person - 'you' feels like a finger in the chest - 'what was the thinking behind this code here' compared to 'what were you thinking when you wrote this code here'.
Also 'we' sounds passive aggressive - 'could we change this colour here?' - well 'we' could, but I will make the change.
I'd go with the passive voice, and let the work do the talking - it leaves it open for people to take ownership. 'What's going on with this code here' - 'ah, that's me, I thought we could xyz at this point' - 'ok, maybe it could abc instead'.
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