I looked into postgres and loved the concept, but in practice, I was using pgbouncer as a connection pool with aggressive connection sharing, and I think pgbouncer did not support the notify/listen commands, and even if it did, I think keeping transactions open was required which meant all the waiters would need separate real connections to the db, which ate up resources and created more problems. That's not to say I couldn't have overcome that barrier but at the time I considered it too risky to try or research further.
Like you, I prefer being able to debug and fix my own applications vs worry about configuration / the learning curve of other software, particularly when my needs are specific. I just rolled my own notifications, of 2 types:
Some things to keep in mind:
We're a place where coders share, stay up-to-date and grow their careers.
We strive for transparency and don't collect excess data.