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Discussion on: Why I'm Not One of the Guys

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ingosteinke profile image
Ingo Steinke • Edited

Isn't this an American English thing anyway, to say "guys"? To me, as a non-native speaker, "you guys" always sounds as ridiculous as "hello there". Also due to the similarity to another word, I used to see a picture of the band Village People when I read or hear "guys".

Nice (which is European English for "great, awesome") that people hopefully try to abandon this idiom, even more so for a better reason...

... only to replace it with "folks", so my mind will picture a folk music band with fiddles, banjo, pipes, and whistles instead of the Village People 🤣😆😂

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nicozerpa profile image
Nico Zerpa (he/him)

Yes, it's mostly American. But lots of non-native speakers (probably the majority of them) learn that variety of English.

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onefoggyscreen profile image
OneFoggyScreen

The mansplaining was not required and just made your argument weaker.

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nicolus profile image
Nicolas Bailly

mansplaining

Ugh... That word is even worse than saying "you guys" to women. It's like only men are allowed to be condescending.

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samuelfaure profile image
Samuel-Zacharie FAURE

There is however a real problem of men being condescending to women. Hence where this word comes from.

Women can be condescending too but it is not because of gendered power dynamics.

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okikio profile image
Okiki Ojo

Doesn't change the fact that it belittled any opinion any man was going to have on the situation, yes sometimes the male perspective may not be the most accurate but it doesn't give anyone the right to belittle opinions based on gender.

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samuelfaure profile image
Samuel-Zacharie FAURE • Edited

I'm not sure you understand what mansplaining is, because you're complaining about a response to mansplaining which doesnt relate to actual manplaining.

Case 1: A man explaining something to a woman. This is not mansplaining. This is explaining.

Case 2: A man, barely competent in a certain topic, explaining this topic to a woman who is a world expert on this topic. This is mansplaining. The man subconsciously -or in some cases consciously- assumes he is more competent because of his gender.

In Case 1, If someone is complaining about mansplaining in that situation, I will agree with you that they are being dishonest.

Mansplaining happens in Case 2, which happens quite frequently in the "man => woman" direction, but way less frequently in reverse. Why? Because of gendered power dynamics. Which is why the word exist.

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okikio profile image
Okiki Ojo

No, it's discounting someone's opinion based on their gender. If you believe some one doesn't know enough about the situation you say some one doesn't know enough about a situation, not that they are mansplaining, the connotations of the word are rather condescending and offensive, "as in I can't speak on the matter because I'm man, etc..." and it's even more offensive when the person who is "mansplaining" believes the insight they have into the situation are fair and valid.

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okikio profile image
Okiki Ojo

The gender power dynamics doesn't change the fact that the person you are talking to it a human that deserves a fair chance to have their opinions heard, also, power dynamics are a cultural thing not necessarily a person by person thing, so, you shouldn't be trying to justify ignoring a man's opinion based on it.

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samuelfaure profile image
Samuel-Zacharie FAURE

You have to realize getting mansplained regularly is a terrible experience that a lot of women live nowadays.

Would you be happy if people from the opposite (and favored) gender would regularly belittle you, patronize you, and assume they know more than you... just because you're not a man ?

After you worked a decade to become an expert in something, you get mansplained by a dude which expertise is that he saw a documentary on the topic two years ago, but he knows better than you because he's a man?

Mansplaining is not "a man's opinion", by definition it's "a man's ignorant opinion". It's disrespectful and is both a cause and a consequence of sexism.

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grahamthedev profile image
GrahamTheDev

Oh dear, so every time someone says "guys" you start singing YMCA in your head? That is an even bigger reason to stop using the term as that cannot be good for your health! 🤣

But what is wrong with "hello there" Ingo?! Are you going to tell me that this guy is using a ridiculous term? 😋

obi wan saying "hello there" meme when he faces General Grievous

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ingosteinke profile image
Ingo Steinke • Edited

Ah, the redundancy of "there". I am here, you are there, so I say "hello there"? Makes no sense at all, but then again, most idioms don't make much sense.

Just found out I am not the only one thinking of the Village Guys:

Meme picture of Vladimir Putin saying I like those Village People guys

memegenerator.net/img/instances/46...

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grahamthedev profile image
GrahamTheDev • Edited

You would hate "hiya", it is somehow short for "how are you" (another silly greeting we have).

However if you responded to "hiya" with "I'm good thanks" (the polite response to "how are you") people would think you are strange!

English is very weird!

Oh and when you hear our sayings they are even more strange (although that seems to be common across the world, Australians say "we aren't here to fuck spiders" which means let's not mess around / waste time! Or better yet the Swedes have "slide in on a shrimp sandwich" to mean someone who didn't have to work to get where they are!) Sadly I don't know any good German ones but I am sure you have some great ones too!

Anyway I digress, yes "hello there" is bloody weird when you think about it!

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nicolus profile image
Nicolas Bailly

"how are you" (another silly greeting we have)."

The most hilarious one to a foreign speaker is "how do you do", to which the only right answer is "how do you do". It doesn't make any kind of sense.

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mangelsr profile image
Miguel Sanchez

General Kenobi, sorry I have to do it...