Two months ago, I started keeping a work journal. Not just task lists and meeting notes - the sanitized version of my workday — but the unfiltered reality: how I felt, where I failed, and what scared me.
Here are four practices that emerged from this experiment in radical self-management.
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1. I Stopped Hiding From My Mistakes
After a significant fuckup that frustrated management, I could have written a polite note of apology and moved on. Instead, I wrote two words at the top of my journal: “I FUCKED UP.”
Then I built a system to prevent it from happening again:
A formal requirements validation process before writing code
A design review checkpoint to verify understanding
Clarifying questions to ask upfront, including: “What would you NOT build?”
But the most important step was writing a document titled “How You Can Help Me” for my manager. I outlined how leadership could provide more explicit constraints and challenge my assumptions.
I wasn’t just fixing my mistake—I was taking ownership of how clearly I understood future assignments. By defining how my manager could help me succeed, I was actively coaching my own leadership. This shift from reactive apology to proactive system-building changed how I approach every project.
2. I Started Tracking Energy Like a Performance Metric
Every day, I rate three things on a 1-to-10 scale: Energy, Focus, and Mood.
This felt silly at first. But after two months, the patterns became impossible to ignore.
During a brutal multi-week grind on a complex feature, my scores plummeted. Energy dropped to 3-4/10. Focus deteriorated. Mood stayed consistently poor for over two weeks. The moment the feature shipped, everything rebounded to 10/10.
This isn’t just feelings—it’s data. I can now see exactly which types of work drain me and which energize me. I can predict when I’m trending toward burnout weeks before it hits. I can make strategic decisions about when to push and when to recover.
Most professionals treat well-being as an afterthought. I now treat it as a critical resource to be monitored, managed, and strategically deployed.
3. I Stopped Going to Meetings and Started Managing Up
I used to show up to 1-on-1s with my manager and wait for direction. Now I prepare like I’m co-creating my role.
Before my last 1-on-1, I prepared three categories of questions:
To Understand Broader Context:
- “From your perspective, what are the team’s biggest challenges right now?”
To Proactively Define Success:
- “I want to balance delivery with deeper architectural understanding—what would success look like for me in the first 3 months?”
To Show Initiative on Team-Wide Issues:
- “What’s your vision for developer experience improvements over the next quarter?”
This preparation changed everything. I’m no longer a passive employee waiting for instructions. I’m a strategic partner aligning my growth with the company’s most important objectives.
My manager once told me these conversations are the most valuable hour of their week. That’s not because I have all the answers—it’s because I show up prepared to help lead.
4. I Started Analyzing Team Dynamics Under Pressure
During a particularly difficult period for the team, I noticed how stress changed our communication patterns. People became more reactive, less constructive. Frustration leaked into conversations in ways that hurt rather than helped.
In my journal, I started analyzing what made communication break down:
Venting without specific problems to solve
Blame without actionable feedback
Emotion without structure for moving forward
Writing these observations wasn’t just venting. It was practice. By deconstructing what went wrong, I was training myself to communicate better under pressure. I was reinforcing the principles of psychological safety that high-performing teams need.
Now when I feel frustrated, I pause. I ask: “What specific behavior or outcome am I concerned about? What would improvement look like?” This mental discipline protects my team’s ability to perform when stakes are high.
What Changed
Peak performance isn’t about maintaining a perfect image. It’s about engaging in a consistent, private practice of radical self-awareness.
In my journal:
Failures become systems
Moods become data
Meetings become strategy sessions
Communication breakdowns become learning opportunities
The insight isn’t in the words I write. It’s in the discipline of writing them—of being brutally honest with myself about what’s working and what isn’t.
What’s the one thing you could start tracking tomorrow?
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