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taylor desseyn
taylor desseyn

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2023 Clock Out: My Top Lessons Learned

Was is just me or did the vibes this holiday season just feel a little off? Based on my completely non-scientific way of asking people, “Did 2023 kick your ass, too?” I’ve come to the conclusion that we all over-stressed and worked way too much, all the way down to the wire in December. So here we are in January— still exhausted, confused, and somehow having the longest short workweek of our career. Now I could start in on a whole list of resolutions to make 2024 #myyear, but instead let’s talk about the things 2023 taught us… besides using, “Yes, chef” as a default response and that Swities could, if mobilized, take over the world. 

To those of you who missed seeing my face over the past month, you can check out my solo show here.

If you want to get right to my list of fails that lead to “learning experiences” in 2023, here you go:

Trust your gut. 

As some of you already know, this year I left my job of 12 years and moved to a new position at gun.io. But if I’m being honest with myself, like really honest, that move was around three years overdue. I’d been thinking for a while it was time to leave, but fear and uncertainty can sometimes make you stay in situations that are no longer serving you. So when I say to trust your gut, I mean that at the end of the day only you know what’s best for yourself. And if the vibes are off, trust yourself and your capabilities that it’s time to quit wasting time and move on. 

I need to prioritize healthy time management. 

I went into 2023 as most of you did with a moderately strict daily work schedule. I could tell you what I should be doing or working on down to the minute. But every day I was just hitting that 2:00 afternoon wall or, even worse, I was leaving work already fully mentally spent and unable to enjoy the rest of my day. So I started planning rest and breaks into my day. Currently, I’m taking a longer lunch to give myself time to slow down and reset so that I can give my full attention at work and at home. Maybe this will work for you too, or maybe you can find another spot in your day to incorporate a sizable break. But I know that if you don’t make an effort to protect it and your mental health, you’re just going to be continually dealing with the biggest workplace villain besides the sound of someone unexpectedly calling you on Teams… burn out. 

Community is everything.

I’m not going to be pedantic by defining community and how it can help you. I will say that I’ve leaned on my community so much this year and it’s led to only great things and great connections. So use that information how you will. 

Have more confidence in yourself.

In 2023, I realized that I’m confident in the places you normally see me— in front of a camera, with a mic, in your inbox. But I’ve had to own that I’m not so confident when it comes to things at home. And especially when it comes to blending my work and home life. It seems counterintuitive to say, find the confidence to talk about your lack of confidence. Maybe for you that looks like a tweet or talking to someone or reading a couple books. Whatever it takes to confront the things that are holding you back from being your best self. 

I’ve got anxiety. 

I mean don’t we all. I think it comes free with your subscription to being human. But when it comes to work, feeling like you’re always in this fluttery panic of “get it done” or “I need to push harder” or “I need to miss out on something to handle this”  isn’t really doing me any favors. Work is always going to be there. No matter if you stay up all night working on something or slam your laptop shut until Monday. If your work anxiety is affecting your happiness, find a counselor to talk to. Can confirm from personal experience that it helps. 

There’s lot of people who know how to talk, but not many who know how to execute. 

The easiest way to stand out at your job is to just get things done. We all know plenty of people who get lost in the sauce of strategizing, pontificating, making diagrams, pulling numbers, and scheduling meetings to talk about scheduling the next meeting. Be the person that actually gets something done. You’ll stand out, I promise. 

Life goes by like hella fast.

I’m not going to slap in a Ferris Bueller quote here, but y’all (looking at myself in the mirror) have got to slow down. Slow down, show up, and be present in your life. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.

You’re being chased by demons. Stop running.

Not like actual demons, more like a giant rolling boulder of all your previous life burdens that’s trailing behind you at increasing speed because you’ve never addressed them or worked to resolved them in any way. 2023 me was just the result of a life constantly performing the version of myself that other people wanted me to be. How’d I work on that? Counseling my friend. Go make an appointment now. 

Invest in your mental, physical, and spiritual health. 

My wife and I were making our 2024 budget and we realized two things: 1) we spend a lot of money on the constant upkeep of these things and 2) we’re going to have to cut back on the iced coffee budget in 2024 to be able to afford them. Totally worth it to not feel like a human slug with anxiety. 

You know more than you think.

Even if you’ve been doing the same job for 12 years and you’re really crazy nervous about making the career leap to the next thing— do it. You might just surprise yourself with your skills that have never been appreciated or noticed before. 

Define what’s important at the end of the day. 

For me, that’s the support of my family. It’s my wife being proud of me and my daughter being happy and giving me a hug after a day of work. I’ve been making it so complicated for years, but I’m starting to realize how simple it really is. 

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