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Sam Jarman πŸ‘¨πŸΌβ€πŸ’»
Sam Jarman πŸ‘¨πŸΌβ€πŸ’»

Posted on • Originally published at samjarman.co.nz

 

Your Ultimate Guide to Corporate Jargon

In this somewhat satirical Junior Dev Diaries post, I want to cover office/tech/workplace jargon and terms. Most of these were completely new to me, and too often now I find myself using them fluently, and for that, I hate myself.

The Terms

Across It – This means understand it after looking at it for a while. Example β€œOh, I’m not across that new work that Jane did on the project yet”.

Catch Up – Have a conversation. β€œI’d like to catch up next week to discuss the project”

Check In – Have a conversation. β€œI’d like to check in next week to discuss the project”

Touch Base – Have a conversation, but you want to be a creep about it. β€œI’d like to touch base next week to discuss the project”

Push Back – You didn’t get your way, sometimes with a reason. β€œThey pushed back on that approach, they wanted us to find a cheaper way”.

Challenge It/You – Tell you you’re wrong, maybe with reasons. Usually for your own benefit or your arguments benefit (you may not have explained it right). β€œI might just challenge you on that, what if we used a 3rd party solution instead?”

Scope – The work to do, and what you don’t need to do. β€œOh that’s out of scope.”

Deliverable – The things that are outputs of the work, such as code or a document.* β€œCan you add the documentation to the project deliverables? Ta!”*

Value Add – The positive impact you add to the company or product. β€œYeah, but what’s the value add here? I dont know if the new client will benefit from that!?”

Pair – Work together on something, because two people will make it go faster…right? β€œI’ll pair with you on that document”.

Conscious Of – Stressing out about something, but a bit more calmly. Something might be bugging them and it’s bugging them that it’s not bugging you. β€œI’m conscious of the time left on the project and the remaining deliverables do be done. How can I help?”

Make a Case – Forming a coherent argument for something that isn’t trivial. β€œThat idea sounds great, Sam. I’ll get you to make a case for it at the next meeting.”

Go Live – When something is being released to the public. Nothing to do with a biological heartbeat. β€œThe new health and safety legislation is going live next week – you’ll see press about it…”

Challenges – The stuff we need to figure out but we’re trying to stay positive about it. β€œBrad, I’m keen to hear about the challenges a two new team members will bring!”

Opportunities – False hope of benefits by the under-informed. β€œI’m really excited by the opportunities Artificial Intelligence will bring to our company”

In This Space – Sentance sugar for β€œhere” that makes you sound so much smarter. Often combined with previous jargon. β€œI’m really excited about cryptocurrency. There’s a lot of opportunity in this space.”

Fall out – Failing on a commitment but trying to get away with it. Somewhat of a β€œbasket of deliverables metaphor I think? β€œI’m afraid that the video feature will probably fall out of this sprint.”

Descoping – Failing on a commitment but trying to get away with it. β€œI’m afraid that the video feature will probably be descoped for this task.”

So that’s a few terms to start learning and using around the office. You can mix and mash them too. Get creative. How many can you jam into a single phrase? Remember, the smarter you sound, the better you are. Think about it – If you’re not both translating in and out of this corporate wankery – are you really working?

Better living everyone.

Thanks to my good friends in my life who I have a bit of a laugh about this with every now and then. They helped me form this most wonderful list. ҝ€

Top comments (6)

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ben profile image
Ben Halpern

Great post. πŸ˜„

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samjarman profile image
Sam Jarman πŸ‘¨πŸΌβ€πŸ’»

Thanks Ben! Do you try read all of these? How do you get anything done!? Haha

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ben profile image
Ben Halpern

Oh, it ain't always easy. I also don't read all the stuff on the site but I read your stuff πŸ™‚

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samjarman profile image
Sam Jarman πŸ‘¨πŸΌβ€πŸ’»

I really appreciate that Ben! You must be a busy guy :)

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Lorenzo Pasqualis

off-line, to indicate a conversation that should be continued in a different setting. "Let's take this off-line".

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samjarman profile image
Sam Jarman πŸ‘¨πŸΌβ€πŸ’»

Another great one!

An Animated Guide to Node.js Event Loop

>> Check out this classic DEV post <<