Head of Product at Temporal. Previously lead architect and low-level systems programmer for scale out SaaS offering. Game engine developer, ML engineering expert. DMs open on Twitter.
My preference is to repeat my point more loudly and forcefully as the discussion goes on, with slight variations in wording. Surely then the superiority of my argument will come through! 😉
Sounds like you could script that :)
In addition to the good points you made in your article, one thing I've learned from experience is that, sometimes in a dev shop, people get into passionate and even angry disagreements, but most of the time it's not worth it.
Passionate is ok, angry not so much. I usually have less issue with people disagreeing passionately and more of an issue with what they feel passionate about. You shouldn't feel passionate about languages and tools because they are just tools.
If the wrong decision can seriously hobble a project, or even the company as a whole, then it makes sense to passionately defend one's point of view. It's still not generally a good idea to get angry and defensive, since that will just get the other people's backs up. But if it's important, one should earnestly try one's best to get one's point across.
Being persistent is definitely ok. Sometimes the outcome of a disagreement is that there won't be an agreement. There are definitely ways to resolve that situation but usually bringing in a third person is enough.
Most things are not so critical though, and if something turns out to be a mistake, the effect may be minor, or it can simply be fixed later on. In such cases, it's best to make one's point clearly once, and if the team goes in another direction, that's okay. Like you said, don't take it personally, and you don't always get what you want. Most of the time, that's okay.
I think it really depends. In general, if you're not in an environment where people take your input seriously, the environment could be improved. This is different than "not getting what you want", you shouldn't always get you what you want, but you should always have a chance to voice what you want.
As usual, great comment. Really appreciate the perspective.
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Sounds like you could script that :)
Passionate is ok, angry not so much. I usually have less issue with people disagreeing passionately and more of an issue with what they feel passionate about. You shouldn't feel passionate about languages and tools because they are just tools.
Being persistent is definitely ok. Sometimes the outcome of a disagreement is that there won't be an agreement. There are definitely ways to resolve that situation but usually bringing in a third person is enough.
I think it really depends. In general, if you're not in an environment where people take your input seriously, the environment could be improved. This is different than "not getting what you want", you shouldn't always get you what you want, but you should always have a chance to voice what you want.
As usual, great comment. Really appreciate the perspective.