DEV Community

Discussion on: Best/Worst Day

Collapse
nina_rallies profile image
Nina Rallies

A new team lead was appointed to our department. we started off on the wrong foot. I ended up with him at HR where we both were practically shouting and it was certainly my worst day... all I felt was hate towards him because to me it seemed as if he was looking at me as being “less” because of my gender. Next day I went in with my resignation letter. Our production manager looked at my resignation letter and asked me if I felt inferior to men? And I said I was equal... he said, be more... stand your ground. 5 months later, I won 2 awards, gained our team leads trust and he recommended me as his substitute ( He was an offshore resource from India) and I got promoted... I stood my ground and I also earned an amazing friend. My former team lead always texts me and asks if I’m already someone else’s “headache” or not 😅😅

Collapse
devcamilla profile image
camilla

With my short working experience, I unfortunately also come across someone who thinks "less" of women in the workforce. At first I thought it was a personal problem but I got shared experiences with other women from other teams. Position is not a factor because even women in higher position was targeted. I eventually left the company but never had the chance to get across this argument. I still hope the situation improve there and pray to never come across one in the future.

Collapse
nina_rallies profile image
Nina Rallies • Edited

I'm so sorry to hear that. Well, basically what my manager told me was that if you go away, eventually the same will happen to other women in your team so stand your ground. Right before I wanted to move to Germany my former team lead invited me over for dinner and we actually discussed it. He said he thought women couldn’t handle it but now he sees things differently. That was incredible to hear. We hired 3 software engineers, he and I discussed each candidate independent of their gender. We ended up hiring 3 brilliant women. I think we should stand our ground and not be bullied. In my case HR wasn't really helpful, but couldn't you file a report and have a face to face discussion with him about it? I think it's a good idea to let him know, cause sometimes men really do not know they are doing it unless you point it out because of them never being the subject of such discrimination maybe.

Thread Thread
devcamilla profile image
camilla

Right now I'm just glad that that chapter is over. Looking back, not bringing it up is one of my regrets. Should've stand my ground at that time but I guess burn out got the best of me. I officially left for different reason which we discussed and came to an understanding at the end. I totally agree with you, he is oblivious about the discrimination. The HR (being also a woman) didn't help. It was tragic that I just gave up at that matter. I left to save my own skin not thinking of other women after me. I should've been braver. I hope to have the courage to speak about it (to him) someday. I'm happy things worked out for you. Your story is an inspiration for us women in the field.

Thread Thread
nina_rallies profile image
Nina Rallies

Don’t be hard on yourself. Your situation was completely different and we always do our best . 🤘🏻❤️🤘🏻