It comes up near the end of your one to one, almost as an afterthought. Your manager says you are doing well, and then adds one thing. A couple of people have mentioned that you tend to interrupt in meetings. You finish their sentences, or you start answering before they have finished asking.
Your face goes hot. You never meant to cut anyone off. You were excited, or trying to save time, or helping someone find the word they were reaching for. All of that may be true, and none of it changes how it felt to the person who did not get to finish.
Do not argue in the moment. Thank your manager and ask for one recent example if they have one. A specific meeting is far easier to learn from than a general description.
Then watch yourself for a week. It is hard to notice interrupting while you are doing it, so make it easier. Put a mark on a piece of paper every time you start talking while someone else is still speaking. Most people who try this are surprised by the number.
Look for the pattern. Is it with particular people, perhaps those who speak more slowly or are working in their second language? Is it when you are sure you already know the answer? Is it on calls, where the small delay makes it hard to tell when someone has finished?
Then try one concrete habit rather than a general promise to do better. Write your thought down instead of saying it, and wait until the other person has really finished. Count to two after they stop. On video calls, use the raise hand button even when nobody else does.
If you catch yourself mid sentence, stop and say, sorry, go on, you were saying. It feels awkward the first few times. It also shows everyone that you heard the feedback, which matters more than getting it perfect.
Consider telling one trusted colleague what you are working on, and ask them to tell you after meetings how it went. A second pair of eyes catches what you miss.
After a month, ask your manager whether anything has changed. Feedback like this is rarely about one bad habit. It is about whether people feel they have room to think aloud around you, and that is worth getting right.
– Asael Shinder
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