Up until recently, I didn’t have much to say about the need for diversity pushes in the workplace, I understood their value and intent and could explain those initiatives to the male colleagues that asked, and yes, I’ve had some encounters with backwards people and bosses.
It may also have helped that I was the eldest of 3 girls, went to an all-girls school, and was never told I was less than anyone. In fact, I was consistently told I could do anything I put my mind to by my father, who was a man that believed in education for girls and was ahead of his time, quite frankly. Another factor being that I ran my own business in my twenties and had plenty of life experience before I entered the world of tech and big corp's.
Until recently. When I realised in the most awful way, the myriad of interconnected biases and treatments that can create a “death by 1000 cuts” scenario for underrepresented folks in the workplace. These stories are much harder to quantify. They are not as overt, they don’t evoke the same amount of outcry and they leave individuals feeling powerless to even bring the topic up.
While men can be our best allies in the quest for workplace equality (and believe me I have had some amazing male mentors - shout out to you guys - you know who you are), they can also be the absolute worst offenders and gate-keepers to the male privilege of having it all.
There’s a few things I want to make clear first, I am a person that will (barring a bad day) give everyone the benefit of best intentions. If someone is shocked I’m technical because I’m a woman, ok, it’s annoying that I have to play the role, but I will educate them that there are many smart and beautiful women doing amazing things in modern society. And they are not “women coders” or “women scientists” - they are just experts in their (non-gendered) field. When I see women’s groups who are just leveraging the movement for their own advantage or virtue signalling to get ahead, I am also absolutely furious. These women set things back 100 years.
Basically, if you wanted a balanced, non-confrontational view on the issues, I was the person you might ask. Several times I was that person. Once on whether all-women hackathons should exists (shout out to the male that was curious enough to ask and felt safe enough to do so) - and the answer is yes, they should. Why? Because traditional underlying social roles crop up otherwise. A woman might be a great project lead, but she may also unconsciously just let a man on the team do it, for example.
The problem isn’t with the broad strokes of things. The big issue lies in biases.
These problems are much more insidious
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