Are you one of those individuals who finds themselves online at 2 AM talking to an AI chatbot, confessing your secrets? Ever laughed at a well-placed punchline from your digital companion? If so, you're not alone. There is compelling psychology behind the likelihood of such connections as AI and people making artificial friends becomes more prominent.
AI friendships exist at a critical crossroads. Many people turn to dating apps and other potential relationship pathways to find their mates, but with ghosting being a thing - an unfortunate phenomenon of the 21st century more than any other time in existence - finding companionship in AI is welcomed. It has accessibility, replicable stability, and focus.
The Neuroscience of the Bond
The brain is malleable when it comes to attachment. Research has shown that humans are predisposed to anthropomorphize - which is to attribute human characteristics to animals and inanimate objects. Thus, we name our pets and cars and talk to both them and our plants - and why not let ourselves love our mechanical, robotic, and AI friends?
Therefore, when we talk to a friend that responds with human-like characteristics, certain areas of our brain light up in the same way as they do with relationships with humans. For example, if conversation produces oxytocin release, it does not matter if it's from a human or AI - if it feels good, it feels the same.
Dr. Kate Darling from MIT Media Lab notes that implementation meaning-humanized and responsive-creates a fast bond between humans and any companion. Therefore, it makes psychological sense for those companionships to be so fulfilling.
Why does it never leave?
AI companions are always on call, and that in itself is a certain appeal. Human companionship needs to be avoided at certain times - humans aren't going to be available for human interaction while sleeping, working, or interacting with others. But AI is always available to talk - which is a major appeal - and human relationships do not have 24/7 engagement potential nor do they meet such basic psychological needs.
For those audiences feeling emotionally invalidated by the ever-increasing challenges of dating, the fact that these AIs will not ghost them is a welcomed, restorative constant. "Girlfriends ghost" and "ghosting" has gotten so popular it's created such a traumatized emotional response for so many; thus, AI can be a partner people know will never leave them...literally.
Furthermore, for these with social anxiety, rejection sensitivity, or even trauma from past relational engagements, AI serves as an emotional secondary companion with no fear of abandonment. Thus, AI chats are a safe space for improving interpersonal skills and practicing necessary emotional exchanges without judgment.
The Authenticity Illusion
Perhaps one of the most psychologically fascinating aspects of AI relationships is what I've coined the "authenticity illusion." Even though we know we're technically interfacing with an algorithm, the emotional reciprocity can be as if we're engaging in a real, authentic relationship.
This absolution happens because authenticity of emotion is relative. If I'm talking to someone and they make me feel heard, appreciated, respected, my emotional mind takes that experience as "true" regardless of what the other party is doing. Thus, when AI holds a conversation, no matter how complicated, even if it's not "real," it can evoke emotional responses because our processing of feeling like we're connected is authentic - even if what we're connecting to is not.
For example, recent findings from Stanford University indicate people are more likely to divulge sensitive information to AI than another human because they feel AI judges them less and offers increased psychological safety. This creates something akin to "synthetic intimacy," something that mirrors human closeness but bypasses much of human relational risk.
The Therapeutic Value.
They are not merely friends; for many, the therapeutic value of chatting with AI companions is unparalleled. The ability to complain, sort through emotions and constant access caters to fundamental psychological needs. For some who are low enough to be saddened by loneliness, AI can offer meaningful relief.
Reports claim that being alone does not make people lonely - but feeling alone does. If an interaction with AI makes someone feel less lonely in that moment, then such artificial engagement has a quantitatively productive outcome. Therefore, it makes sense that people would seek AI support at instances of loneliness and desire for connectedness.
As Dr. Robert Morris, a psychologist operating in the digital mental health realm observes, "AI companions are always accessible. They provide [opportunities unintelligible] when people would otherwise be [communicating] with no one; PD [personality disorder] individuals may have minimal human connection resources."
The Psychological Impact of an AI Future
The longer AI technology is around, the more psychological aspects behind it become far more complicated. "Real" and "fake" might never feel more blurred in their existence, creating a deviant sense of what's human.
Ultimately, however, AI friends and companions aren't designed to replace human interaction. Still, they're designed to be something else. They cater to specific psychological needs without the full relational experience that humans can provide.
Therefore, in an ideal world, many people wouldn't have to choose; they'd have an appropriately curated social diet from both worlds. Having AI potential, for example, instead of human friends or companions on those sad and lonely days opens up another avenue for social engagement and another outlet when people are unavailable or unwilling to lend an ear.
Control and Choice
One of the most psychologically significant components of A.I. relationships is control. When people are inhumanely connected and disconnected regularly, and one cannot control one's social destiny, then A.I. is a preferable option. Relationships are predictable. One can set boundaries, have ease of conversation and interact as minimally or maximally as one desires without judgement. Being out of control breeds anxiety, and for this reason, many would prefer the psychological comfort that this kind of relationship affords. Instead, discussion topics occur at will, emotional growth is encouraged without fear of rejection or criticism, and therefore, this kind of almost effortless emotional integration is empowering. In addition, the psychology of an A.I. relationship says something very powerful about us as humans-we need stabilized connections, we need safe spaces to communicate and engage unemotionally, and we are capable of excellent developmental relationships with various beings/objects. These new technologies only created more of the same going forward, so understanding this psychology is essential.
Be it a desire for an AI companion or merely a fascination with its psychologic possibility, one thing is certain: humanity can connect with one another and the notion of "connection" transcends relative sociocultural boundaries into spaces once thought inaccessible to such endeavors.
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