I think you're exaggerating quite a bit. While all you describe happens to some extent as expected (many people on the internet are impolite d**** and the SO community is big enough to make matters worse), in my perception it's not as bad, as you describe it to be.
What I personally don't like is that they don't allow for opinion based questions about best practises (e.g. what's the best approach to ...) even though many of those still existing are very popular. I think this is an area, despite all the flaws of a voting system used by humans introduces, the system could really shine.
I'm just describing my own decade of experiences on the platform, combined with the experiences of people I've mentored and helped over the years. It hasn't been pretty, no exaggeration.
Maybe for someone frequenting different tags than I did, it would look different? StackOverflow is certainly big enough that one can't necessarily see all the bullies on the jungle gym from the swings. ;)
I spent a lot of time in C++, C, Python, and ActionScript 3.0, among others. The problem definitely seems more acute over there.
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