Let's get real
You know that feeling when you walk into a new place for the first time? That feeling of "oh no, what am I doing here...I certainly don't belong here?!" It's an odd feeling of both excitement and fear. If you have felt this way, or currently feel this way, I am here to tell you...SAME! I am sitting here typing this post today because I want to expose myself and say...I have felt this way, I do feel this way, and here are some tips on how to deal with these feelings - not get rid of them (because I would argue that these feelings are good ones), but just to simply...deal with it!
Okay, here is tip number one on how to deal with these feelings, that for the sake of fun, I will call "baby feelings" because you simply feel like a baby...helpless, can't express yourself correctly, kinda lost in the world. This tip may sound silly but just breathe. Take a moment, and calm down. It may be overwhelming right now, but just think about where you will be a month or even a year from now. If you just calm down and breathe, for now, I can promise you will be more productive and ready to face the day.
Visualize your day
Before starting my new job (yes, I just started a new job, which is part of the reason why I too am dealing with baby feelings) I chatted with another developer friend of mine about his day and what he does to stay so motivated and productive. I met with him in the first place because it always seems like he has his life together. He assured me that, even though what I see online seems that way, the ones who you look up to are not always as perfect as they may seem. But he also told me another very helpful tip, and that was to visualize your day. He expressed how he does this every morning. All you have to do is sit in a quiet place, close your eyes, and visualize your day. Think about the plans you have, any problems you may run into, the meetings you have scheduled. He expressed to me that this helps him (and now me) think of any problems that could arise and avoid them, or at least prepare for them before they happen. While doing this, be sure to write down anything that comes to mind - whether that's solutions to those problems you can foresee or just some encouraging words that you know you will need before you hop in a big meeting.
Define your fears
Okay, I know this sounds kinda crazy. Normally, people tell you to define your goals, and not your fears...but I am here to tell you the opposite. I recently watched a Ted Talk by Tim Ferriss (one of the many people I look up to) where he talked about "defining your fears instead of your goals." This also ties into what I was saying in the paragraph above, if you expect the fears or troubles that you might have during the day, you can avoid them, or at least expect them. This almost gives you the superpower of expecting the unexpected - because you will be expecting it! The technique is fairly simple...
- define your fears (write them down if you would like)
- define the worst outcome if those fears do come true
- define what you could do to avoid these fears
For me, this has worked tremendously in my own life, it really gives you the power instead of your fear.
Make your decisions - and don't overthink them
Ever since I can remember I have always been an indecisive person. I can never decide what clothes to wear, what nail polish color I want, or what flavor of ice cream I should eat. Decisions are hard, and I am definitely not going to be the one to tell you that they aren't (especially because I have trouble even making simple ones). But if there is one thing I have learned over the years of battling with my own indecisiveness, it's that when you make a decision, stick with it! Now, I am not saying that you shouldn't think about your decision, I am just saying that once you have thought about it, make the decision and do it! Do you want to ask your boss for a raise? Do it! Do you want to say something during a meeting that you've been too shy to say? Do it! Do you want to order mint chocolate chip ice cream instead of your "regular order?" Do it! Anyway, I think you get my point...just do it!
Thank you all so much for reading! If you wouldn't mind pressing that little ❤️ icon on the side of the page that would be much appreciated 🤗 Also, please feel free to comment with any tips that you have used to deal with your own "baby feelings."
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