This is a submission for the 2026 WeCoded Challenge: Echoes of Experience
Back in 2019, Being an avid reader, I used to brag about having 120+ books in my mini library.
Yes a mini library, a quit, sacred space for an introvert me, It was my den; the place where I used to declutter my mind, recharge, and think.
Years of Chaos
Then came the year 2020, during Covid Lockdown, chaos happened, and there was uncertainty all around.
Amid fears of layoffs and ambiguity of working from home, collaborating remotely, I was promoted to lead a team of 4 entry-level developers.
I threw myself into it, by upskilling the team in modern web technologies and remote collaboration tools.
Word got out, People from other teams who wanted to learn JavaScript also joined my daily after-office classes.
But then, reality bit. My organization underwent a massive restructuring, and a team of 40 got downsized to 22; I survived, but that survival came with a hidden tax.
Cost of Survival
The survival comes with a cost, a cost where one event led to another,
where imposter syndrome entered, along with people pleasing.
As the only person left with full-stack experience in React and Laravel, my plate didn't just fill up; it overflowed. I was suddenly tasked with assisting Business Development to convert leads.
As a first-timer, I followed what everyone says, the standard industry mantra:
Under-promise and over-deliver.
What they don't tell you is that this advice comes with a "terms and conditions" clause.
When you over-deliver repeatedly to the same person, you aren't being a hero; you're setting a dangerous new baseline. You become taken for granted.
In my case, over-delivering led to massive scope creep. The team I was supposed to lead started feeling the heat.
I lost the mental space required to lead effectively.
The Breaking Point
The true cost of this "over-delivery" didn't just impact my code; it taxed my family.
In August 2023, my father suffered his first brain stroke. It was a terrifying, grounding moment that laid bare the fragility of my "hustle."
While I was busy over-delivering to clients who took me for granted, I was under-delivering to the people who actually mattered.
I had lost the mental and emotional space required to be a lead at work, but more importantly, to be a son at home.
The weight of being constantly "on" meant I was physically present but mentally absent when my family needed me most.
Reclaiming the Bookshelf
Today, I'm in the process of reclaiming my time and my mental "den." It's a slow build back to that 2019 peace of mind, and I'm doing it through a new set of operating principles:
Setting Hard Boundaries: My time is no longer an open-ended resource.
The Art of 'No': Learning that saying "no" to a feature is often saying "yes" to quality and family.
Promising Rightly: Moving away from the "over-deliver" trap and toward accurate, sustainable expectations.
Killing the Hype: Eliminating buzzwords and stopping the chase for every new shiny framework.
Rigid Scoping: Evaluating project boundaries with a critical eye before the first line of code is written.
Fundamentals First: Building strategies and systems that are reliable, not just fast.
My mini-library is still there. Now, I'm finally making sure I have the headspace to actually read the books in it and the time to be there for the people who hold my world together.
Top comments (0)