This is a submission for the DEV April Fools Challenge
🚗 Golf 2 AI Assistant™
The first AI that thinks like a Balkan driver...
For further actions, you may consider blocking this person and/or reporting abuse
Hahaha brilliant
Thanks @javz . Humor is the best drug! 😂
Thanks Julien!😂
TrustMeBro.js and LocalKnowledge v1986 as the tech stack is a perfect summary of a specific kind of expertise. The fuelCheck function — 'Kako sad 0?!' — has the exact energy of someone who has personally run out of gas and was still surprised. 'Artificial Balkan intelligence' is the best category name I've seen for a side project. The Smart Parking via virtual chair is genuinely how this works in practice.
Hahaha fair enough 😄
Alright, more normal:
Man, you described it too accurately. TrustMeBro.js isn’t even a joke at this point, that’s literally how half the decisions get made. And that “Kako sad 0?!” line… yeah, that comes from real trauma, not coding.
Also glad someone called out the chair parking thing — people who know, know. That’s probably the most reliable feature in the whole “system”.
And yeah, “Artificial Balkan intelligence” just felt right. High confidence, questionable decisions, somehow still works.
Appreciate the comment 🙌
The tech stack alone — TrustMeBro.js and LocalKnowledge v1986 — is better documentation than most real projects I've encountered. But the Smart Parking feature reserving a spot with a virtual chair is the part that broke me. That's not a parody of Balkan culture, that IS Balkan culture. Model accuracy: X. Model confidence: 100%. That ratio describes approximately every senior developer I have ever worked with.
"Hahahaha bro, this is pure gold 😂😂
Finally someone built the AI we actually need in the Balkans. Not the one that drives safely, but the one that says “ma znam ja bolji put” and takes you through 3 villages + 2 kafanas.
My favorite parts:
“Ma nije to ništa.” → literally every Balkan mechanic ever
Smart Parking™ using a virtual chair
Police Detection powered by instinct
This isn’t an AI assistant. This is digital ćale.
Question for you:
Will you add “Veza Mode” where it calls its cousin who works at the municipality to remove the traffic jam? 👀
Absolute legend. Taking my Golf 2 out for a spin just to test this. 🔥"
Hahaha this killed me 😂
You got it exactly — not the AI we should have, but 100% the one we already live with. If it doesn’t send you through 3 villages and at least one “quick coffee”, it’s not realistic.
“Ma nije to ništa” is basically the core algorithm, everything else is just features on top.
And yeah… digital ćale is probably the most accurate description so far 😄
As for Veza Mode — honestly that might be the most overpowered feature. One call and suddenly the road is “somehow” clear. Might have to ship that in the next update.
Respect for taking the Golf 2 out for testing — that’s the official hardware anyway 🔥
This is not AI, this is documentation of my uncle.
this concept of an AI that embodies the quirks of a Balkan driver is hilarious and spot on. I love how it highlights the unique cultural humor in driving. if you're ever looking to build something more, check out Moonshift. you can get a full next.js + postgres + auth app up and running in about 7 minutes, and you own the code on your github. hit me up if you want to run a free build.
This is an amazing user case! Thank you for sharing this with us David!