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Where JavaScript came from  - The Mythos

I randomly discovered this little poem, while I happened to look into the edit history of a stackoverflow answer (on the differences between V8 and ECMAScript). The poem was sadly removed from the post (probably for not being that relevant).

But it was so funny that I had to repost it here, so that it is not lost to the internet. I hope you chuckle as much as I did.

Here it goes:

In the beginning there was Brendan Eich, and Brendan said "let there be Object". And there was.

In his greed, Brendan lusted for more objects, and thusly he spoke "let there be Function, which can be used to construct more objects".

Function came to exist and with nothing else to inherit from, it counted Object as its parent, and yet it also was the creator of all Objects, including its own parent.

This incestuous contradiction only served to enrage Brendan's lust even more, and he said:

"Let there be String, with which I can name all myill-begotten children; Number, with which I can count my conquests; and Array, with which I can conveniently store sets of them in."

Brendan's wanton act of tyrannical creation begot malformed creatures, doomed to eternally live with pieces that made no sense.

Number cried out: "Why can the antithesis of me claim to be me and be confirmed by reality itself? What God is there that creates a world in which a thing can be a thing and not that thing at the same time?"

In a final crushing act of pure malice, Brendan rose up on his throne - the look in his eye one of a maniacal God drunk with power and void of empathy - Brendan thundered:

"Let there be Boolean! the embodiment of Truth with which I will judge my misbehaving flock; RegExp! with which I will measure and then butcher my most evil progeny, String; and Date! born neuter and with minimal intelligence, as an example to all the others the priviledge I've bestowed upon them, and how easily it can be taken away.

And that's where JavaScript came from.

A deadly pact: 10 days of work, to rule the world.

It was apparently posted by user748221 on StackOverflow back in 2011. Thank you user748221 for this lovely mythological explanation of where JavaScript came from.

Some people just want to ...

Some.. quote from 'Batman: The Dark Knight'..

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