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Victoria Odeh
Victoria Odeh

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Debugging Ifeoluwa’s Life

Ifeoluwa had been learning PHP/Laravel for a few weeks, and let’s just say — it was a trial by fire. Variables, controllers, migrations… her brain felt like an overloaded server. But she was determined. She had already built a basic CRUD app, even though the “D” (delete) part kept mysteriously deleting everything.

That evening, she decided to take a break from coding and focus on worship at church during the mid-week service. The service was going smoothly until the pastor confidently declared:

“James 1:17 says, ‘Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness neither shadow of turning.’”

Ifeoluwa blinked. Wait… no variableness?

She sat up, suddenly very awake. No variables? As in… $name, $email, $password? So God wasn’t into coding?

Her mind raced. Maybe that’s why my code keeps breaking. I’ve been trying to do something God isn’t interested in.

She started imagining God debugging her life:

`if ($ifeoluwa->faith < 100) {

throw new Exception(“O ye of little faith!”);

}`

Or maybe Laravel was the problem. After all, Laravel had facades, and didn’t Jesus warn about hypocrites wearing facades?

By the time the sermon ended, Ifeoluwa had convinced herself that she needed to “repent” from loops and return statements. But just as she was about to abandon coding forever, a thought popped into her mind:

Sin was the bug that entered the system. Jesus is the ultimate patch/update that restores the corrupted world. The Holy Spirit is the AI assistant guiding users (believers) to follow God’s design.

Ifeoluwa gasped. She chuckled to herself and whispered, Maybe God isn’t against coding. He’s just the Ultimate Full-Stack Developer and we are running on His divine operating system.

And with that, she walked out of church, ready to debug her faith — and her Laravel project — with fresh confidence and a strong will not to give up.

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