title: [Book Sharing] The Ultimate Chat Method - Even the Most Awkward Can Chat Up a Storm, Interpersonal Communication Skills for a Lifetime
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date: 2022-07-20 00:00:00 UTC
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canonical_url: http://www.evanlin.com/reading-best-chat/
---
[](http://moo.im/a/4qtzAN "The Ultimate Chat Method")
The Ultimate Chat Method - Even the Most Awkward Can Chat Up a Storm, Interpersonal Communication Skills for a Lifetime
超雑談力 人づきあいがラクになる 誰とでも信頼関係が築ける
Author: Tatsunari Ikarota Translator: Hsieh Min-yi Publisher: Fang Zhi Publishing
Published: 2021/12/01 Language: Traditional Chinese ISBN: 9789861756479
#### Book Recommendation Website:
- [Readmoo Online Book Purchase](http://moo.im/a/4qtzAN)
# Preface:
This is the fourteenth book I've read this year. This is considered a leisure book. Since I often give people a more serious image, I need to understand what kind of chatting is better. Seeing these types of books published in Japan, I feel they all have a characteristic: concise yet practical. I thought I'd buy it to see if it could make me chat with more quality.
# Content Summary:
Essential for mature adults, solve all the troubles of not being able to speak or chat!
Japan's best-selling book, with a series of books selling nearly a million copies,
The super popular communication manager gives you tips for awkward chats,
Even introverted, shy, gloomy, and uninteresting people can do it!
★ Includes a "7 Basic Rules + 20 Small Tips" quick reference chart, carry it with you, and use it immediately when you have to chat awkwardly!
◎ Feeling tired when talking to someone you've just met
◎ The atmosphere is low when talking business with clients
◎ Don't know what to say when with your supervisor, very awkward
◎ Being asked about your salary, when you'll get married, and have children during a family gathering, wanting to roll your eyes
◎ Having to exchange pleasantries with your partner's parents, so troublesome...
The above situations are tricky situations that all people in society will encounter.
For work, social interaction, or family harmony, you have to chat with people you're not close to, and just thinking about it feels like being in hell. Is there no countermeasure? Yes! This book is here to help you solve this problem.
# Chapter Outline
Seven basic rules, once you know these, awkward chatting is not difficult at all:
1. Simple back and forth, keep the conversation going (don't seriously try to make the chat interesting)
2. Exchange feelings (rather than exchanging information)
3. Talk about events and experiences (rather than current affairs)
4. Affirm the other person (rather than providing opinions to negate)
5. Exaggerate reactions and share the joy with the other person (rather than guiding the other person to continue talking)
6. If the conversation is interrupted, go back to "topics related to yourself" (rather than forcing a topic)
7. End at the right place (rather than chatting until the end of time)
And then the next chapter has some practical related skills, which are also worth recording:
- Start with "hello"
- Ask about the origin of the name
- What have you been into recently? (Better to chat about than interests)
- Find common topics (rather than finding common friends)
- Ask the other person to talk about things you don't know
- Let the other person speak first, observe the situation
- Talk about each other's "likes" (rather than sharing each other's opinions)
- Talk a little about yourself, then bring it back to the main topic
- Large body movements
- Echo the other person
- When encountering topics you don't like, end the topic with "thank you."
- Purely practice social skills
Also, regarding chatting skills in the workplace, the Japanese are still very polite and follow rules.
- Through hierarchical relationships, like a master-apprentice way of conversation. (Let the other person think that you are asking for help, which is better to chat)
- Seize the brief moment and strike up a conversation.
- Select keywords to respond
- Through "Can I take notes?" let the other person continue to share
- Having lunch together can further cultivate feelings.
- When encountering requests and invitations, immediately reply "okay"
- Chat about the gossip of artists (rather than the gossip of acquaintances)
# Thoughts
The books written by the Japanese all have a relaxed tone with simple but concise content. This book has many very important chatting skills. Chatting is mainly about the expression of emotions and thoughts of both parties, avoiding turning into discussions and opinions in the chat. And there are many small skills that can bring the distance between each other closer in the chat, and achieve a meaningful emotional exchange through the chat.
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