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Kai Oswald
Kai Oswald

Posted on • Edited on • Originally published at kaos.me

5 tools no developer needs

A satirical approach to tools that exist, but no developer actually needs.

1: Power Mode

Unleash your true developer power with power mode extensions!

Do you find writing code boring? Well, you just didn't have the right extensions installed.

With this extension you can immerse yourself into your code and enable your inner coder beast by looking at increasing combo counters, screen-shaking and fancy particles!

Code editor with a combo counter on the right side. When typing the counter increases and particles fly out from the cursor position. The screen is shaking

But it gets better: Customizable particles!

Code is written. Every now and then a plasma explosion occurs on the cursor position

Missing your old friend Clippy? No more!

Clippy (the office assistant from Microsoft) hovering beneath the cursor position spinning around

If you're using Hyper, you can even unleash your full power in the terminal.

A terminal window typing commands. Every now and then particles fly out from the cursor position. The screen shakes.

Links:

2: Rainbow fart

Never get the attribution you deserve for your code?

This VS Code extension compliments you for writing code with an automated computer voice.

The code quality doesn't matter at all, even shitty code will get complimented.

Not an actual rainbow fart btw:

Rainbow Fart is a literal translation word from Chinese, which means giving somebody exaggerated compliment that even seems a little fake. It is not connected to any specific group or individuals.

Links:

3: Explodal

Do your dialogs not get the attention they deserve? Just add explodal to your projects.

https://raw.githubusercontent.com/jessekorzan/expodal/master/assets/img/dbbl.explodal.01.gif

Links:

4: Obnoxious.css

Speaking of lack of attention. With this css library you will guarantee the attention of your users.

You can choose between 5 highly efficient animations.

My favorite among these beauties is probably "Intensifies".
Demonstration of obnoxious text animations such as

Links:

5: Git push rockets

Would you really forget to push your code if that triggers a rocket launch? I can tell you that my git pushes have increased drastically since I've used some of these tools.

Terminal rocket for Hyper

Terminal typing git push. After the command is executed a rocket crosses the terminal window from bottom to top

Not realistic enough? Cover your whole editor with this VS Code extension

A realistic rocket launch is displayed after git push is executed

Links:

Concluding words

This was a fun article to write. Definitely more on the side of "Too deep into the code extension marketplace".

Install them for fun or just for the memes.

Let's connect on twitter.

Top comments (23)

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jouo profile image
Jashua

5 tools no developer needs
1: Power Mode

That's where you're wrong kiddo (☞⌐■_■)☞

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elmuerte profile image
Michiel Hendriks

Power Mode and the VS Code Slack Theme is the only way to use that tool.

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jem profile image
Jem

But, for real, I love the rockets.

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madza profile image
Madza

Someone should make a VS Code extension that opens up 8h SpaceX Falcon9 Livestream on git push 🚀🚀🚀

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0916dhkim profile image
Danny Kim

And splashdown on git pull

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scroung720 profile image
scroung720

The Christopher Nolan modal was the best thing.

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weakish profile image
Jang Rush

Had a lot of fun reading this! I'd like to translate it to Chinese (and publish the translated text at nextfe.com). Can you give me the permission to do so?

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kaos profile image
Kai Oswald

Sure, if you link back to this article :)

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weakish profile image
Jang Rush

Chinese translation published: nextfe.com/5-tools-no-developers-n... There is a backlink at the beginning of the translated text.

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33nano profile image
Manyong'oments

This is actually cool 👍🏽

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phantas0s profile image
Matthieu Cneude

This is beautiful. Thanks.

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kamo profile image
KAIDI

Thanks fot sharing these gems

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cray2015 profile image
cray2015

I laughed so hard!!!!

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mdev88 profile image
Martín Vukovic

Actually I use Nyan Progress bar for accessibility reasons XD

youtu.be/gK5GdDvPuy4?t=6