Unix pranks to slowly drive your friends mad

I made a small, fun list of pranks to troll people. I'm looking forward to see what ideas you have, so please add them in the comments.

1. Slow down their Terminal.

Every time a new Terminal is started, it's slowed down by .1 seconds. 😈

2. Change ssh folder to shh

From this: https://twitter.com/nixcraft/status/1045760653510815744

3. Change Editors!

Vim opens emacs, nano opens vi, and so on. I've been called one of Top ten evil people for this 😂

4. Make date return random dates

Similarly, for the cal command,

5. Make cat print an actual cat!

This happens randomly. The base64 string is for the cat.

function cat() {
    rdm=$(( ((RANDOM<<15)|RANDOM) % 5000 ));
    if test $rdm -lt 400
    then
        base64 -D <<< "ICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgVC4iLS5fLi4tLS0uLl8sLSIvfAogICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICBsfCItLiAgXy52Ll8gICAoIiB8CiAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgIFtsIC8uJ18gXDsgX34iLS5gLXQKICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgWSAiIF8ob30gX3tvKS5fIF4ufAogICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICBqICBUICAsLTx2Pi0uICBUICBdCiAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgIFwgIGwgKCAvLV4tXCApICEgICEKICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgIFwuIFwuICAifiIgIC4vICAvYy0uLixfXwogICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICBeci0gLi5fIC4tIC4tIiAgYC0gLiAgfiItLS4KICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgID4gXC4gICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgXAogICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgXSAgIF4uICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgXAogICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgMyAgLiAgIj4gICAgICAgICAgICAuICAgICAgIFkKICAgICAgICAgLC5fXy4tLS5fICAgX2ogICBcIH4gICAuICAgICAgICAgOyAgICAgICB8CiAgICAgICAgKCAgICB+Ii0uX34iXi5fXCAgIF4uICAgIF4uXyAgICAgIEkgICAgIC4gbAogICAgICAgICAiLS5fIF9fXyB+Ii0sXzcgICAgLlotLl8gICA3IiAgIFkgICAgICA7ICBcICAgICAgICBfCiAgICAgICAgICAgIC8iICAgIn4tKHIgciAgXy9fLS0uX34tLyAgICAvICAgICAgLywuLS1eLS5fICAgLyBZCiAgICAgICAgICAgICItLl8gICAgJyJ+fn4+LS5ffl0+LS1eLS0tLi9fX19fLC5efiAgICAgICAgXi5eICAhCiAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICB+LS0uXyAgICAnICAgWS0tLS4gICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICBcLi8KICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgfn4tLS5fICBsXyAgICkgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICBcCiAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgIH4tLl9+fn4tLS0uXyxfX19fLi4tLS0gICAgICAgICAgIFwKICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgIH4tLS0tIn4gICAgICAgXAogICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgICAgXA=="
    else
        /bin/cat $1
    fi;
}

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I have a GitHub repository with more pranks and copy-paste-able code: zeroby0/pranks. You can find more pranks at Mathias Bynens' Evil.sh

Also, Hi! I don't believe we've met before. I'm Aravind. I program micro-controllers, and design websites. Take care not to cause damage while you have fun.

Have a great day! (or night, wherever you are)