The third time I got catfished, I didn't just feel embarrassed. I felt angry.
Not at the person who fooled me - though sure, that too. I was angry at the entire system. At dating apps that profit from engagement but don't verify a single photo. At a world where we're supposed to trust strangers with our hearts based on pixels that could be completely fabricated.
So I did what any frustrated engineer would do. I built something.
The Three Times I Got Fooled
The first time was classic. Her photos were stunning - maybe too stunning, but I told myself not to be cynical. We talked for two weeks. Great conversations. Real connection, I thought.
When I reverse image searched (something I now do religiously), I found her photos on a Brazilian model's Instagram. The "person" I'd been talking to didn't exist. Those conversations? Probably some scammer running ten accounts simultaneously.
The second time was sneakier. The photos were real - technically. Same person, same face. But they were ten years old. When we met for coffee, I genuinely didn't recognize her at first. Is that catfishing? It felt like it. The trust was already broken before we even ordered drinks.
The third time broke me. Beautiful photos, consistent story, even video called once (she said her camera was "glitchy" so it was low quality). When we finally met, nobody showed up. I later found out the photos were AI-generated. The whole person was fabricated by someone looking to string me along for... I still don't know what. Money eventually, probably.
That's when I went down the rabbit hole.
The Problem Nobody's Actually Solving
I started researching and the numbers are staggering:
- 72% of online daters have experienced catfishing
- 55% of dating profile photos are fake or significantly outdated
- $1.14 billion lost to romance scams in 2023 alone
- 8 million+ deepfakes created annually, and that was last year
The tools we have are failing us. Reverse image search? Only catches recycled photos, not AI-generated ones. Video calls? Deepfake video is getting scary good. Asking for a specific photo? They can generate that too now.
Dating apps could verify photos. They choose not to. Verification would reduce the number of attractive profiles, which would reduce engagement, which would hurt their metrics. The incentive structure is broken.
The Aha Moment
I'm a software engineer, so I started thinking about this like a technical problem. How do you prove a photo is real?
The answer was sitting in plain sight: cryptographic signatures.
It's the same technology that secures your bank transactions and proves that a website is who they say they are. A mathematical signature that's essentially impossible to forge.
What if we could sign photos at the moment they're taken? Not after editing. Not after filters. At the actual moment of capture, creating a cryptographic proof that:
- This photo came from this device
- At this exact time
- And hasn't been modified since
If the photo gets edited even one pixel, the signature breaks. The proof is gone. You can't fake it, you can't forge it, you can't AI your way around it.
That's when I knew what I had to build.
Building Proofmi
I called it Proofmi - as in "prove to me you're real."
The concept is simple: Take a photo with Proofmi, and it's cryptographically signed at capture. That signature lives with the photo forever. Anyone can verify it with one tap.
No AI detection algorithms that might be wrong. No trust-me-bro verification badges that mean nothing. Mathematical proof. Either the signature is valid, or it isn't.
Here's how it works in practice:
- Take a verified photo - Open Proofmi, snap a pic. The app signs it instantly.
- Share it anywhere - Put it on your dating profile, send it in a chat, whatever.
- Others can verify - They tap one button and see: photo is authentic, taken at this time, unmodified.
For dating, this is huge. Imagine being able to prove your photos are real before you even match. Imagine asking a match for a verified photo and actually being able to trust what you see.
Why I Think This Matters
After getting catfished three times, I developed serious trust issues with online dating. I'd second-guess everyone. Overanalyze photos. Assume the worst.
That's no way to find connection.
What I wanted wasn't just protection from scams - I wanted to be able to trust again. And I think a lot of people feel the same way.
Proofmi isn't going to catch every catfish. Someone could still lie about their job, their intentions, their relationship status. But it solves the most fundamental question: Is this person who they appear to be?
That's a start.
Try It Yourself
If you've been catfished, or you're just tired of wondering if the person you're talking to actually looks like their photos, I built this for you.
Download Proofmi on the App Store
Take some verified photos. Put them on your profile. Ask your matches to do the same.
Let's make photo trust the new standard.
Got catfishing stories? Found ways to protect yourself online? I'd love to hear about it. And if you try Proofmi, let me know what you think - I'm still building and your feedback shapes what comes next.
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