The Advice Paradox
There's this weird thing that happens when you're building in public and sharing your journey - people start coming to you for advice. "How do you manage it all?" "What's your secret?" "You seem to have it figured out."
The irony? having skipped my workout because my legs literally shake by evening, with a social battery that's been running on fumes for weeks.
The Hidden Energy Drains
Here's what's messing with me lately: I'm not scrolling social media mindlessly. I'm not going out unnecessarily. I'm not doing obvious time-wasters. Yet somehow, I'm more drained than ever.
The culprit? I'm giving energy to things that seem important but actually aren't. Those little interactions, decisions that don't matter, conversations that go nowhere - they're the hidden battery drains that nobody talks about.
The Co-founder "Friends" Situation
Had an interesting moment with my co-founder today. She thought I was mad at her (I was), and after we sorted it out, she pulled the classic "you seem down, we're friends, you can share with me" line.
My response? "Co-founder sounds more realistic than friends."
Look, I'm not trying to be cold, but this isn't a movie. I don't have bandwidth for emotional special effects right now.
The Relationship Thought Experiment
Random thought hit me today: should I get into a relationship just to refresh my brain after work hours? Like having someone to decompress with, someone who's not connected to all the startup chaos?
Then I remembered why I don't: everyone turns out to be the same tiresome level anyway. Maybe it's my current state, maybe it's just reality, but adding relationship complexity to an already complex life seems... counterproductive.
The Loneliness of Building
There's this strange space you occupy when you're the person others come to for advice. People see "the guy who knows the right way" but they miss the part where you're back in your room, alone, figuring it out as you go just like everyone else.
The advice-giver needs advice too. But who do you ask when you're supposed to have the answers?
Maybe that's why building in public resonates with me. At least someone sees the actual process - the 3am bedtimes, the skipped workouts, the energy management failures, the moments of doubt disguised as strategic decisions.
Energy Management Reality Check
I need to get better at identifying what actually deserves my energy versus what just feels like it should. The obvious time-wasters are easy to spot and avoid. The subtle ones - the conversations that seem productive but aren't, the decisions that feel important but don't move anything forward - those are the real killers.
What's Actually Next
Despite all this, I'm sure about what's next. It's just that so many random things keep coming up that pull focus from what actually matters. Learning to say no to good opportunities so you can say yes to great ones is harder than it sounds.
The shaky legs will recover. The social battery will recharge. The energy drains will get identified and plugged. But the building continues, because that's the only way forward.
The Real Talk
Some days you're the inspiration. Other days you're just trying to make it to bedtime without your legs giving out. Both are part of the process.
Building in public means sharing both versions - the highlight reel and the behind-the-scenes exhaustion. Today was definitely more of the latter, but that's okay too.
Tomorrow I'll probably have more energy. Or I won't, and I'll figure it out anyway. That's been the pattern so far.
Day 93 of building in public. Some days you inspire, other days you just survive. Both count.
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