Everyone has this time in life when they feel imperfect and emotionally exhausted. We continuously doubt ourselves, every single day no matter what happens. Moreover, even successful people have gone through this feeling in their lives.
Unfortunately, lots of us have this tendency to concentrate on the negative aspects and events. I did it too much and once after one of my "rebirths" I stopped doing that.
I also heard those voices in my head like "You can't do it, you are not good enough, nobody likes you, you are not cool, you are so annoying..." on a day-to-day basis.
In the end, no matter how successful you get, no matter how many people like you and even look up to you. You still doubt and question yourself.
You can be #1 in any field, and you will still at times think you are not good enough.
It’s only human.
When I was starting with blogging around two years ago, my mind was always thinking of: "You are such a joke, you think you can write? You are not that qualified, just spare your time and quit it."
Honestly, the only reason I decided not to give up and continue writing is that I understand that I will lose nothing in the end and can only benefit from that.
So, I am happy that I have made the right decision at that moment and now I cannot imagine my life without blogging. Besides that, it scares me to think about how many opportunities I would have missed out on if I caved into these voices regularly.
Point being, we will always doubt ourselves and be our cruelest critic. Even after we have proven ourselves competent and smart and beautiful and successful. Again and again, these will be there.
This self-doubt is nothing, but low self-confidence with low-worth plus a firm belief in our own incapability will impact our lives significantly.
However, I think a little self-doubt is normal and sometimes even healthy. Because it prevents a person from going beyond the line between over self-confidence and arrogance.
Doubting ourselves and our abilities have a very paralyzing effect, but on the other hand, it also inspires us to find different ways to manage our inner fears.
I divide doubts into two groups - positive and negative. Here is a definition of good and bad doubts that I can agree with. In essence:
- Good doubt is a constructive skepticism that wonders about risks and pitfalls out of a wish for you to succeed.
- Bad doubt is a destructive skepticism that dwells on issues and problems with the hope that your efforts will come tumbling down.
Observing other people around and myself, I can say that people who doubt themselves are generally more sensitive. Also, positive doubts cause thousand "Why" questions, expand curiosity, open our minds to look for more perspectives and question them as well.
Positive self-doubts can stimulate us to set personal goals/targets or action plans and be fully prepared to take on any challenge that comes our way.
The other bright side of the positive self-doubt is that people who experience that are usually motivated to work harder: they have this superior work ethic, and that makes them professional in the field they are working in.
Positive self-doubts also encourage going through the person's checklist to ensure that everything is in order and makes aware that all things or skills or efforts which are required to complete a task/todo are learned and applied.
Usually, positive doubts prevent us from stopping creating. Here I mean we use them to improve ourselves. Don't think you are good enough? Then train! Practice! Get your hands on whatever helpful resources you can find. Challenge yourself to grow. Use this positive doubt as your inspiration to better yourself and your skills.
You see, frankly, positive self-doubt is an essential part of professional development and accomplishment.
Sure, we are making a lot of mistakes and doubt many things in pursuing our goals. However, without self-doubts, we would stop our self-growth.
Do you have self-doubts which lead to anxieties and depression? If yes, have you tried transforming your self-doubts in positive output for your life? How?
Photo by Paolo Nicolello on Unsplash