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Asking for Help for Introverts

lynnecodes profile image Lynne ・3 min read

Over the weekend, it was brought to my attention (when asked about my learning progress) that I don't ask many questions or ask for much help. I didn't really know how to respond to that. I'm not even going to downplay it--learning JavaScript is hard for me. It got me thinking, I know have questions. Why don't I just ask? I believed that if I figured things out on my own, I wouldn't have to ask for help. I have such great support from this community and my family in tech. So I felt that I should figure out what's going on in my brain and do my research of why I don't ask questions and what I can do to educate myself to make this learning journey better.

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I had to come to an understanding that I am an introvert. I get stuck in my thoughts way more than I should. So I already know that asking for help is hard.

I found this great article, "8 Reasons Introverts Might Find it Difficult Asking For Help" by Andy Mort, that explained . . . well, me! Here's his list of the whys:

  1. You Tell Yourself that You Have it Easy Compared to Others
  2. Fear of Rejection
  3. You’ve Experienced Dependency in Other People
  4. You Don’t Want to Feel Like You Have Burdened Someone Else
  5. Reciprocity
  6. Fear of Losing Control
  7. A Belief in Self-Reliance
  8. Overwhelmed by the Potential Energy Drain

After reading this article, I couldn't believe how ALL of these reasons pertained to me and how I felt about asking for help. Different reasons for different problems, but I've experienced every single one of these feelings. Especially while I'm learning JavaScript.

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I realized that's not a bad thing to ask for help or a burden to ask questions. It was my own fear that prevented me from being courageous and relying on other people for support. I really should be asking my questions when I don't understand something. Asking even saves time!

For example, I started #JavaScript30 last week and here's a snippet of my code:

function playSound(e) {
    const audio = document.querySelector('audio[data-key="${e.keyCode}"]');
    const key = document.querySelector('div[data-key="${e.keyCode}"]');
    if (!audio) return;

    key.classList.add('playing');
    audio.currentTime = 0;
    audio.play();
}
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It took me more than an hour to figure out why the code wasn't doing what I wanted it to do. This wonderful community of experienced devs could have told me it was something as simple as mistaking an apostrophe for a backtick. I really appreciate feedback and constructive criticism, but I just find it difficult to ask for it. I just have to keep reminding myself, there's no such thing as a stupid question.

Last Week's Accomplishments:

  • Started building JavaScript projects with #JavaScript30

Check it out:

On My Mind:

  • Does anyone have learning tips for introverts in this field? How do you put yourselves out there?

Until next time!
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Discussion (1)

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ender_minyard profile image
ender minyard

I'm an introvert and I ask for help a lot, from anyone and everyone. I guess my advice is to focus on the end product and making sure you successfully finish the thing you're working on.