At the almost end of the last year, I had taken up a ritual, a religious virtue on my hands. To learn to code, to learn to build, not just websites but build value, And to some extent, that’s what I solely did. Learned to provide value through code, through menial lines of words displayed on a screen that didn’t make sense to most people but somehow it conveyed value, somehow it made me happy. Somehow it quite brightened my life.
But that didn’t last long, more than I expected. at the peak of October this year. I started getting frustrated, frustrated with coding, not coding but the reason that I had at the start of my journey was morphed into something I didn’t want. Annoyed, that I almost religiously started to hate building websites.
I was angry, at myself. For getting bored, watching Tutorials, after tutorials. I was basically stuck in a tutorial hell and didn’t seem to find any reasons why I would want to continue on this path. I was bored of making websites too, changing the font style, changing the header tag. And god knows what.
I had lost my reason. The reason that got me into it in the first place, The reason that had helped me endure the terrible cycles of learning and practice. The reason that actually made me get excited about learning to code. And actually to code.
I had lost it somewhere, somewhere in the journey. From the superfluous innovation, I dreamt of at the start of my journey, to the money I was chasing by the end.
I wasn’t excited, I wasn’t enjoying the “stucks” the coding provided me, just simply I was not sure about the path ahead.
So, I dumped it. And went to look for a path. A different path that would excite me for the time being.
Tried, I won’t say a lot but a few things, Things with careful consideration. From Day-Trade To Possibly enrolling for Psychology. But in the end, nothing worked. At least not the way I thought it would. I was still chasing money, it’s not that I don’t deem the importance of it, but I find it exhilarating to chase something that I don’t find exciting.
Only to end up here again, The dream I had at the beginning of my adolescence. To innovate, to create, and to at least change the world with value, with value that I can provide, that my abilities and capabilities can provide.
I knew I wanted to innovate, but also knew I had to get above money. Just enough to pass by, to strive. So that’s what I chose. This time.
My top priority is to innovate and secondary to strive.
But, before any of that jazz, I got to learn, learn everything again from scratch till the moderate intermediate I was.
So, here’s my journey. From now on, getting into development again. And possibly for the last time.
My goal this time is to expand as much as possible, but also specialize in a few areas to keep myself sane. To at least get “ching ching” money.
So, I’ll be starting as the most start. By going through The basic standards of the web. Html, CSS, And JS.
And then probably will move to “React Native”, this time as I am quite excited to explore the awakenings of mobile development. And possibly Flutter too.
Though my end goal as of right now in the hierarchy is to learn and understand more about “Blockchain, And CryptoCurrency Tech”. But yes I’ll probably be dwelling into a lot of spaces before I either find one (which is unlikely) or just explore possibly everything (which is also unlikely).
yes. The only thing I would say I need this time. Is LUCK.
So, Best Of Luck.
Top comments (1)
Thank you for sharing and "bearing your soul".
I hope you do rekindle your passion for development and fall into an area of expertise that interests you! Keep pushing! ❤