I used to play hardcore games every night after work. Permadeath. No saves. One mistake and everything's gone.
I haven't touched a game in weeks. My actual life became the hardcore game.
The Setup
January 2026. I signed up for Claude Code at $200/month. I'm not an engineer. I can't write a single line of code. My only motivation was: "I want to make games."
The first thing that happened wasn't game development. It was config addiction.
Setting up the AI's development environment felt like a tycoon game. Change one setting, the AI behaves differently. Add a hook, it stops going rogue. Tweak the instructions file, it suddenly understands what you want.
I was so deep in configuration that I burned through my daily tokens before doing any actual work. Classic optimization trap - I was min-maxing the wrong thing.
But I couldn't stop. It felt like raising a Tamagotchi. Each small adjustment made the AI noticeably better.
The Physical Damage
My sitting time exploded.
Even while the AI writes code, I'm watching the output. Reviewing. Planning the next instruction. Reviewing again. Hours vanish without me noticing.
Result: I threw out my back. Went to the orthopedic clinic. My shoulder pain got worse. My hairdresser told me "the area above your forehead is incredibly tense" - apparently from overusing my eyes and brain.
I now give myself regular scalp massages. The AI handles the code. It does not handle my spine.
The Brain Rewiring
Something shifted in how I see the world.
Before AI, when I encountered an inconvenience, I'd think "oh well." Now I think "could I build something for this?"
The answer is usually yes - not because I can build it, but because I can describe what I want and the AI can build it.
This mental shift is subtle but massive. I went from being a consumer to seeing everything as a potential project. The world became a backlog of ideas.
From Playing Games to Making Them
The hours I spent playing hardcore games every night now go into making games.
The surprise: making things is stress relief too. Different from playing, but equally effective. And unlike playing, building occasionally generates a few dollars. Not enough to cover costs - not even close - but the direction is right.
The FOMO Disease
This is probably universal among AI power users.
Once you start using AI, every minute the AI isn't running feels like wasted potential.
Taking a bath? Start a task first. Going to the park with your kid? Queue something before you leave. Otherwise that time feels "wasted."
I can access it from my phone, but the laptop is 10x more productive. So I end up just watching from my phone, unable to do anything meaningful.
This is probably a disease. I'm aware of it. I haven't found a cure.
The Two-Week Brain Meltdown
Two weeks in, my brain broke.
Multiple tasks running simultaneously. Writing articles while building a game while designing a tool while planning marketing. My brain is single-threaded. AI forces it into multi-threaded mode.
I genuinely thought I was losing my mind.
I wanted a digital detox. I wanted to go to an onsen (Japanese hot spring inn). So I asked the AI to find me one.
"My brain is melting from too much AI, so I'm asking AI to find me a place to recover from AI." I see the irony. At the time, I was dead serious. I never ended up going.
Life Is Now Hardcore Mode
I keep thinking about why I loved hardcore games.
The tension. The permanence. No do-overs. Every decision matters because you can't take it back.
That's my life now.
$200/month ticking away like a countdown timer. Revenue so far: $5. Two months in, I'm $395 in the red. There's no save point.
But I can feel the levels going up.
Not my skills - I still can't code. But the AI is growing. My ability to direct it is growing. The "me + AI" team is getting stronger with every session.
The XP I used to grind in games is now real-world XP.
I used to love games where death is permanent.
Now I'm living in one.
I'm in debt. My body is falling apart. My brain melted once already.
But this is the most fun I've ever had.
This is part 1 of a series about living with AI as a non-engineer. I pay $200/month for Claude Code and document everything that happens - the wins, the failures, the back pain.
Next: "AI Gave Me a Herniated Disc" - the health costs nobody talks about.
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