We have all been there. You walk into a room full of tech enthusiasts, the ambient noise is humming with intense architectural debates, and your social battery immediately drains down to a critical five percent. While the natural extroverts are flying across the room launching themselves into every single conversation circle, you are looking for the absolute best strategic position next to the catering table, silently calculating how many sandwiches you can politely consume before it is socially acceptable to slip out the back door unnoticed.
I was a complete introvert and I still am, but I consider myself an ambivert now, as I convert my personality according to the convenience required. It is like having a dynamic runtime configuration that changes depending on the environment variables. I enjoy solitude, as well as presenting things in a group or speaking in public. Exactly one year ago, I was a complete introvert and I didn't have the courage and confidence to present myself or to speak on a stage, but recently, I hosted a small segment in a tech talk where I had the opportunity to interact with the audience, present a quiz to them, and make them engaged and active. If a guy who used to treat basic small talk like a terrifying production failure can do it, you absolutely can too.
My Backstory: From Underconfident to On Stage
Exactly one year ago, I wasn't a confident guy, and I didn't have the courage to speak to anyone I meet. I was very much fearful and very much under-confident to present myself to anybody. Walking up to a stranger felt like trying to fix a critical database bug live in production with the entire engineering team breathing down my neck. But the reason that change was, I wanted to take this as a challenge and present myself to people, attend tech talks, interact with the strangers there, and maybe network with them.
The main issue that I faced was the career gap, where the people attending these events are mostly students and here I was, an unemployed guy looking for new opportunities and new networks. It is incredibly intimidating to stand in a room where everyone is asking, "So, what stack do you work on at your company?" and your honest answer is, "Localhost."
But the last whole year, I have enjoyed every bit of it and just wanted to convey my feelings that if I can present myself on a stage, then anybody else can do it as well. The initial step that I took was to attend many tech talks and talk to one stranger at a time. I was pretty nervous on my first event, but eventually, I got habitual of it and the more people I interacted with, the more I get to know about how to interact with people and how to get the most out of it. As I started connecting with people, my LinkedIn connections grew, and I started posting about the events and showcasing my learnings of that event, which helped me gain more and more confidence to present myself on LinkedIn and to present myself to other people as well.
The Corporate Divide: Navigating Networking Hurdles
The story ain't all sunshine and rainbows, as I was in the middle of the two distinct groups that were present in the events. One group was the juniors in college that were looking to meet new people, connect, make new connections, get a referral or a job, or find a guide in their career path. The other group was the seniors that were already in a good job and were looking to make good connections to get an even better job.
So, I was right in the middle of them: an unemployed guy looking for new opportunities and trying to connect with people. Because of this, many of the people that I met really didn't wanna connect with me. They were actively looking for someone with a high-profile corporate title who could help and guide them better. That was a bit frustrating for me, but I never took it as an insult, but rather as their loss and losing a good connect.
I don't consider myself an expert on the topics, I enjoy each and every conversation and the genuine time given to me by the other person. While attending events, I always felt unplaced in those environments as I wasn't able to find anyone else looking for new opportunities. Either I met someone still in college or someone settled in a good company. But I reminded myself that I was there for the event and not for them, so I enjoyed and learned from each and every event and added the gist to my daily workflow.
Becoming a Event Veteran: Finding True Value
The more events I started attending, the more veteran I got. I majorly attended Google events happening in my city, so many of the people started recognizing me, and I started recognizing more and more people that I met in other events. I was laughing when I came home and thought about it, because everyone knew me by face and not by my name. But hey, that is exactly what you get for consistently attending events with 200 to 300 people! I became like that one mysterious open-source contributor whose avatar everyone recognizes, even if nobody knows their actual real-world identity.
I met a few genuine people that were way beyond the superficial discussions about jobs and corporate status. I really enjoyed the quality time that I have spent with them and the massive amount of discussions we had on AI and the upcoming trends. It was truly exceptional to learn from others and share my experiences and my knowledge as well.
I say I call myself a veteran because once I attend an event and I meet three or four people there recognizing me and shaking hands with me, it changes the dynamic. There was even someone sitting across the table who said, "Yeah, I know you, I have seen you in other events as well," and I was like, "Oh, I'm that veteran now!"
I always accomplish the task of meeting someone new and talking about the event and how the event was. I was pretty nervous about it always, as I always felt like, "What would I say if someone judges me because I don't know much about the specific topic they like?" I was pretty nervous about it, but yeah, I did it anyways, and if they liked the conversations, at the very end they will ask, "Can we connect on LinkedIn?" and I was like, "Yeah, sure."
The Secret Weapon: Using Humor to Break the Ice
I always felt like I am a bit funny and I can crack a few jokes. So, I took this quality and with each and every conversation, I added a few jokes and a sense of humor to the people that I talk to. The more people I talked to, the more I got to know about how to present myself, what are the specific topics that I can joke about, and what are the delicate boundaries that I need to avoid. That has helped me a lot on how to present myself and how to joke in a corporate setting, as the people there are very professional and it is the first time I am meeting them, so I absolutely can't lose on presenting myself as a cheap clown.
The thing that I have realized is that humor is the best thing that can be used to break the ice. For me, I am naturally nervous, and that could be easily true for the other person as well. They could be nervous as well, so giving them a short smile helps them to be a bit calm and express themselves even more. The more I joked with the persons at the event, the more comfortable I felt, as for me, a sense of humor is my go-to comfort space. That has helped me immensely in presenting, starting, or maybe moving the conversation directly into my court.
I can't say that I have made hundreds of elite connections and that I am completely flawless at networking, but what I felt that I have successfully achieved is that I am good at presenting myself and getting the other person comfortable to talk more and more. The reason I am saying that I am good at presenting myself is that for me, if I met someone, that other person has willingly stayed with me through the whole day. There was nobody in the journey that has left me mid-way to go meet new people and connect with others they genuinely enjoyed having conversations with me and having a good time with me.
Connecting the Dots: Stepping Onto the Stage
For me, it has been a pretty awesome journey as I enjoy every single part of it. The next big challenge I took was to speak on the stage, which was terrifying as I had never held the mic before in my life. I never had the courage to present myself on a stage. The catch at this specific event was that if you wanted to win a free coffee cup, you had to stand up and speak for a minute about the event. I was pretty nervous and incredibly excited at the exact same moment, but I felt the urge to go for it and maybe get the prize as well.
That was the first time I ever presented myself on a camera or to a large audience, and I did pretty okay okay. I was super nervous and I was completely lost on words. I wanted to say a whole lot, but only a few scattered words actually came out of my mouth.
But that experience got me hooked, and I wanted to do it even more! Soon after, there was another event where we had to build a project, and the organizers asked if someone wanted to present their idea. I was nervous, but I resolutely kept my hand up, and I was selected to speak about the project. My project was relatively simple, but I wanted to have the courage to stand up, speak about it, and say a few confident words on it. So, I started it, kept explaining the project, and actually got two or three big laughs from the crowd because my idea was quite literally "Tinder for food." As I got off the stage, my legs were physically shaking, and I was pretty fearful about what had just happened to me, as I was completely unaware that I was truly capable of presenting myself on a stage to a group of people. But I did it anyways, and I enjoyed it.
Then came the biggest moment for me till now. I participated as a volunteer in an event, and there, I got an actual formal opportunity to present and interact with an audience. That was simultaneously scary and exciting for me. I was prepared, but my mind was spinning with negative thoughts: "What if this happens? What if that happens? What if I am not able to connect with the audience? What if they won't laugh at my jokes?" There was a massive amount of chaos in my head, but this was the new 2026 Konark, who has built up the immunity to just go for it and give your best shot at it.
The big moment came, I presented the quiz, and I interacted directly with the audience for the next 15 to 20 minutes. Everyone was completely hooked up with the quiz, with the jokes, and with the unique insights that I had put into the questions. Everyone was shouting out the wrong names intentionally, as the wrong names were even funnier than the actual right answer for the quiz.
For the first few minutes, I was pretty nervous and shaking, but as I told you before, humor is my absolute forte, so I can't lose in my own battlefield! Once one or two jokes successfully landed, I knew that I had firmly gotten the attention of the audience.
And you know what was the hardest part for me? I had to interact with an audience that had just consumed food and was in a complete trance state after a heavy lunch. Initially, they were completely unreactive to my "good afternoons," and for a second, I thought I would just bomb completely and that I needed to jump off the stage ASAP. But as I got comfortable, they got introduced to the mechanics of the quiz. The quiz started, my jokes landed, and then I was on fire! I joked about the event, how joyful it was, and how much I have enjoyed learning from the sessions that were there. With each and every joke, my confidence grew up, and I finished pretty awesomely.
If this had been the 2025 Konark, then the segment would have bombed completely, but since I kept presenting myself again and again, got my learnings, and constantly improved on them, I nailed it this time. Maybe next time, I'll share the story of doing a tech talk.
My Top Tips for Introverted Developers
- Attend tech events, and connect and network with people. This will help you to present yourself to someone else other than your usual friends and family. This way, you will learn how to present, how to answer their unexpected questions, and how to comfortably introduce yourself, like what you do, how you do it, etc.
- Give yourself a challenge to at least talk to one person in that technical event. The more the merrier. Forcing yourself to talk to just one single person in that event will eventually help you to present yourself, make a good connection, and start a brand new friendship.
- Talk to the speakers and give them feedback. Ask them active questions about their topics. Learn directly from them learn how they present themselves, learn how they conduct a talk, and learn how they handle intense pressure situations. Keep your eyes open and have the ability to learn from their movements.
- Enjoy each and every moment and each and every interaction. Be genuine and be interesting. Talk about the things that you find interesting or the things that are your absolute forte. That way, you will have an ease of talking rather than constantly finding and compiling words in your head.
- If you aren't comfortable in talking in English, try in your native language and try to speak your mind. If you have the foundational ability to speak your mind clearly, then you can eventually have the ability to convert whatever you are thinking into English and then speak it smoothly.
- Be eager for all the opportunities, even if you are an introvert. Present yourself as if you are an extrovert, talk like you are an extrovert, and represent yourself like you are an extrovert. To give you my own example: on my very first event, I talked to exactly one person, and in the last event that I attended, I talked to ten people at least, and the event topic wasn't even my main forte!
- It's okay to have a bad day. Don't blame yourself if you weren't able to convince yourself to talk to even a single person at an event. Just challenge yourself to talk to two people in the very next event. Be forgiveful to yourself.
The Feedback Loop
I hope my personal story and these practical tips will help you to be better as an introvert in this loud tech world. At the end of the day, networking isn't about being the loudest person in the room it is just about finding the right timing to execute your conversational strategy without breaking your internal application state.
Thank you so much for reading through my journey! If you have your own personal tips to share as an introvert, or a funny story about trying to survive a tech event, kindly share them in the comments below. Let us discuss and help each other out!
If you want to keep swapping networking tips, talk about upcoming tech trends, or just connect with a fellow ambivert, feel free to send a connection request over on LinkedIn. Let us keep growing our networks and stepping out of our comfort zones together!
Top comments (21)
Really enjoyed reading this, Konark! I could relate to the part about starting with just one conversation at an event. It's surprising how much confidence builds from those small interactions over time. Congrats on stepping out of your comfort zone and even getting on stage. Wishing you many more talks and great conversations ahead 👏
Thank you so much for you kind words Hemapriya. It really means a lot. I'm really happy that you found my story relatable.
Thank you so much for the wishes. We all need to move out of our comfort zone in order to get what we want. Some people realize it early some realize it late. Sure, someday I will do my first tech talk and then share my experience.
Hope to see you grow as you are an awesome writer. Your articles are well written, well thought-out and pretty easy to understand. Thank you for being so awesome and writing such amazing articles.
Really enjoyed reading this, Konark. It was cool seeing your journey from someone who struggled to start conversations to someone confidently hosting part of an event. That kind of growth doesn't happen overnight.
One thing your story reminded me of is my own experience. I've always admired people who could effortlessly make everyone laugh, and for a while I thought networking almost required that. But over time I realized people don't remember you only because you were funny, while of course it is a plus point, but they also remember you because you made them feel comfortable and had something genuine to say.
So for anyone reading this who thinks, "I'm not naturally humorous," don't let that stop you. Clear communication, genuine curiosity, and listening well are incredibly underrated skills. If you can communicate your thoughts honestly and make the other person feel heard, people will respect that just as much as a well-timed joke.
Ironically, I think confidence comes after enough conversations, not before them. Every interaction teaches you something, and eventually you stop worrying about saying the perfect thing.
Great read, and congratulations on how far you've come. Looking forward to reading the story of your first full tech talk. 😄
Thank you so much for your inspiring words. Of-course, growth doesn't happen overnights. For the past one year, I was considering it a failure of talking to just one person but rather I was deepening my roots to turn myself into a big and strong communicator. I'm still learning and looking forward for the next moment to step my foot on a new stage.
Yes, exactly as I was watching a video on networking it also shed the light on this but you mentioned it clearly. People will connect with you for who you are and how you made them feel. If I make someone uncomfortable that person will never comeback to me for a talk. Making everyone laugh is just my coping mechanism just like Ross from friends. I joke when I'm nervous as it helps me calms down better than the other person.
A perfect advice from a senior dev. Thank you so much for this advice Aryan. I have a simple rule for confidence and interactions. Just when traveling back home analyze your day what you said, what things you said didn't work, what things someone else said that might have hurt me, what things I need to learn after a quick analysis I got prepared for my next event. This is how I learned what to joke about in those events. For me, every laugh counts 😂.
Once I get invited to talk I'll share the experience. I need to learn and master a lot before reaching that stage. But I think I'm capable to speak I'll be nervous but I might be entertaining as well.
I'd push back on 'shine' as the goal. the introverts who thrive in tech didn't match extrovert output - they filled gaps extroverts consistently skip: the written spec nobody finished, the post-mortem that never happened.
ok, answering "Localhost" when someone asks what stack you work on got me. The tip about giving speakers feedback is the most underrated one on the list, they're usually standing alone right after the talk while everyone heads for the snacks, so it's the easiest genuine conversation in the whole event.
Finally someone got my joke haha. Yes, and unlike everyone in the event they don't have an ulterior motive other than giving their best talk and since they are on the stage represents the experience they have and it's best to gain the most out of it.
:) Thanks for sharing!
Nice. It was really interesting and the tips where useful too. hope i can use them someday.
Honestly i live in Iran and we got no such thing as meetings here, at least nowhere near my city. My English is really good too but like there are literally no meetings to attend. one of my main dreams is to attend an actual meeting and talk with people who understand programming and my hobbies. nice job by the way i really loved how u improved and leveled up. i mean that is NOT easy. thumbs up.
I'm sure you will use the tips and attend and maybe present yourself on a stage someday. Dream big as dreams come true.
I hope you and your family are safe in Iran. Stay safe. You can try to attend online meetings try and look for them maybe then you might the exposure you need till you attend one in real life. I'm sure your dream will come true asap. You can talk to people in the comments or add them on their socials to talk more about programming.
Thank you for the wishes. Hope to see you grow and shine as a rainbow.
Thank u for u'r attention. this community has really been a comfort zone for me. thanks again
Your experience is quite interesting and very informative, to the tech introverts like me, and tbh, I'm such a humor person, but I'm not making use of it in proper way, cause I hardly interact with other tech people, all I have to say is that, for now, I don't engage myself in any tech events, cause I'm still learning more stacks, and at least you've gotten some experience in your career before you decide to start venturing yourself out to the event, all it's fine with you, and I learned a lot things from your experienced being shared, and I think the most easiest way to get to people at first impression, is to read their minds, and faces, then know how to put your speech with them, always looking forward to connecting with a great minds like you.
Here's my twitter x handle: Dii Tech Dev.
For now, I'm not on LinkedIn, cause my account got banned, and I couldn't reach their specific requirements for now, I'm still focused on my learning.
Thank you so much for your words. I'm just sharing my experiences that can be used as a stepping stone for others to learn from. You can go and attend an event and enjoy an event. The learning never stops just go and have fun. If I had waited to attend events after learning stack then I would never had gotten out. I use this analogy for tasks like these. If I wanna go for a ride but my condition is I'll only leave the house when all the traffic light turn green then I will never go for a ride. Go out have fun and learn that's all I can say.
You can't read everyone and if you analyze everyone you will loose the ability to enjoy the event. Rather than this just be yourself, as you will attract the people who are like minded like you and after attending one or two events you will know how to say and what to say, time and experiences teaches everything.
Huge thanks for your comment. Keep leveling up and showing the world what you're capable of! I followed you on twitter. All the best for all your future endeavors.
Thanks champ, my regards to you 🫂
I have heard all what you said
I have followed you back too
This resonates with me. I have always been far more comfortable imagining, creating and building than being on show. As a business owner, I've forced myself to handle meetings, training sessions, seminars and workshops, and even attended courses to improve my presentation skills. Despite all the training, it has never become something I naturally enjoy or feel completely comfortable doing but that's probably because I always fall back into my comfort zone. I expect the article is right, that confidence often comes from repeated exposure rather than waiting to feel ready.
I hope you get all you want. All the best for your future presentation skills. If you won't apply your knowledge you won't make any progress. Maybe, you can present in front of your friends and family and ask for constructive feedback and then present it to teammates or colleagues and give yourself a chance. Take it as a challenge, and give your best at it. As I feel Trying your best is far better than regretting past.
Great, encouraging article. Thank you! It's nice to read about others going through the same experience. Gives me hope that I can also participate and engage more at these events!
Thank you so much, L. Cordero. Everyone goes through some experiences the ability to turn my experience into a stepping stone for others is what I try to do. And I'm really glad you had similar experience as well.
Your potential is limitless, and I can't wait to see where your talent takes you next. All the best for your upcoming events. Rise and shine.😊
female introvert in tech world... double damage 😫
They are even better than us. I have attended more female talks and their stories are very inspiring. You also have the full potential to be the best at it.
Not double damage, double power. Look at @jess how she and ben created this platform and how awesome and inspiring she is.
All the best for all you future endeavors and I know you will do awesome. Keep rising and shining.