The "Alien" Phase
For a long time, I felt like an alien.
I’m naturally reserved. I’m not the loudest person in the room, and for years, I thought that was a defect. I grew up surrounded by people who didn't really get me. I found myself forcing an interest in things the "masses" liked, such as trends, generic hobbies, and surface-level conversations, just to survive social situations.
I was masking my true self to fit in, and it was exhausting. I thought, “Maybe I’m just not built for connecting with people.”
I wasn't anti-social, I just didn't have a social circle that spoke my language. I was starving for intellectual connection but looking for it in all the wrong places.
Finding My Voice on Dev.to
Then, I started writing here.
Initially, I thought Dev.to was just a place to dump code snippets. But as I began sharing my personal experiences, my learning journey, and my struggles, something shifted.
I realized I wasn't shouting into the void. I was speaking into a room full of people just like me.
Writing allowed me to express myself in a way speaking never did. It gave me the space to articulate my thoughts without being interrupted or feeling the pressure to be "cool." Suddenly, my obsession with tech, my curiosity about how things work, and my specific interests weren't "weird." They were the currency of this community.
The "ROI" of Putting Yourself Out There
Here is the crazy part: Networking doesn't always happen in a suit at a conference center. Sometimes it happens in the comment section.
Since I started consistently sharing my journey and being vulnerable about what I’m learning:
I’ve connected with amazing developers who share my niche interests.
I’ve had recruiters slide into my DMs because they liked how I explained a concept.
I’ve even landed paid freelance gigs purely because someone saw a post of mine and thought, "This person knows their stuff, and I like their vibe."
I didn't have to change who I was. I just had to change where I was speaking.
The Next Step: Stepping Into the Real World
Because this platform gave me the confidence to believe that my voice matters, I’m challenging myself to take the next step.
I am going to start attending in-person tech events.
Yes, as an introvert, the idea is terrifying. But now I know that when I walk into those rooms, I’m not walking in as an alien. I’m walking into a room full of potential readers, friends, and collaborators.
What’s Coming Next?
I want to take you along for this ride.
The DevOps Journey Series: I will continue writing my technical series on Linux and my journey to devOps (which I love writing), so stay tuned for those deep dives.
The Event Series: I will be starting a new series documenting my experiences at these in-person tech events. I’ll share what it’s actually like, how I handle the nerves, and who I meet.
You Are Not Alone!
If you are reading this and you feel like the "alien" in your circle, please know you aren't alone.
There is a massive community of people here who are interested in the exact same things you are. You don't need to force yourself to like what the masses like. You just need to find your tribe.
Start writing. Start sharing. You’ll be surprised who writes back :)
Top comments (2)
This hit close to home. I’m a reserved person by nature, and for a long time I avoided building an online presence because sharing my learning felt intimidating.
A couple of weeks ago, I decided to change that and start documenting my journey into data engineering, not to be loud or to show off, but to be honest about what I’m learning and where and how I’m growing. Reading this really validates that choice.
I love the idea that you don’t need to change who you are, just where you’re speaking. Dev.to really does feel like a place where curiosity and depth are valued. Thanks for putting this into words.
I am so glad you also found the courage to share what you are learning ! Being a part of this community just makes you know you're not 'weird', and you meet a lot of people who are just like you ❤️:)